Archive for guilds

Birth announcement

Posted in General, Transcripts with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 26, 2014 by Garrosh Hellscream

earthonline11

Faranell’s gotten things lined up for Shayari’s move to the Undercity.  She won’t be leaving for a couple days still, but everything should be in order.  That also leaves me some time to get down there to see how she’s doing before she heads out of town.  I haven’t gotten much of a chance to go see her yet – yeah, yeah, I know, even after Liadrin made such a stink over it – what with everything else I need to take care of around here.  I’m not going to be in Orgrimmar much longer than Shayari, only in my case, when I leave I need to know everything is set to run smoothly while I’m in Pandaria, and in order to make sure that happens…well, come on.  You’ve seen the pinhead minions I’m surrounded with, mostly.  Hell, even Malkorok has been in lousy spirits (yes, even by Malkorok standards) ever since he got back from helping the doc with Shay’s arrangements the other day.

Anyhow, point being, there’s been a shitload of stuff going on.  We’ve got some major construction projects in the works, which means we’re going to need tons of resources.  Lumber, fuel, the whole nine yards.  We even need to up the food supplies just to feed all the extra workers we’re bringing in.  In order to keep up with the demands, I’m reassigning some Kor’kron to the Barrens to work on gathering resources.  On the plus side, all the manpower we need pretty much means there’s no such thing as unemployment in Orgrimmar anymore.  (That should look pretty damn nice on my record when I run for reelection.  OH WAIT, THAT’S NOT HOW IT WORKS, I’M APPOINTED FOR LIFE.  Suck THAT, would-be rivals from within my own party.)

Needless to say, all this has kept me pretty busy with meetings and planning sessions and OH DID I MENTION THE FUCKING PAPERWORK?  And this time around I can’t even shuffle it off on Eitrigg, since he’s being all pissy about being quasi-sorta-kinda-demoted.  Things have been so packed, schedule-wise, that I’ve barely had a chance to catch any down time…but, seeing as this is the first time in months that I’ve actually had a stable internet connection…

 

You have logged on.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  but if you get a buff from eating, why don’t you a bigger buff if you eat more?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Well well, look who we have here!

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  because they want you to go do things in the game, not sit around eating all day

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  A good day to you, daddy dearest.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  well that’s just crazy talk

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Hello Omgipwnedurface

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  …

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  HI PWN

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  hi omgipwnedurface

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  hey boss

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So I’m guessing you’ve talked to Faranell

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  wait, what?

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  GOOD TO SEE YOU ON

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  hello, garrosh, i was wondering if i could have a word with you

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  I swear I didn’t say anything to her, boss

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  Oh this should be good

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah hi

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  He emailed me earlier, yes sir.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Oh yeah, I know YOU’RE all about keeping secrets, Half-Pint

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Faranell, that is.  Not Spazzle.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  NOT ME

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  yeah

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  By way of making arrangements for the arrival of…what was her name again?

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  hey, did you get my email?

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  I HOPE YOUR CONNECTION IS BETTER

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Shayari

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  Yeah, I did

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  well i’ve been thinking about the mokvar situation – it seems like his problems all go back to blackrock mountain, so i was thinking maybe if did some looking around there we might be able to come up with some new leads

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  I think I get why you did what you did, not that it still doesn’t irritate the fuck out of me

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  no really, whats with the daddy dearest thing?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Ah yes, Shayari.  Lovely name.  Does it mean anything?

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  well, I think that was everything mokvar told me about his past as a mercenary and the attacks on him

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, I’m back home on my normal connection

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh, you haven’t heard, Gayle?

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  It better be.  I’ve had more than enough of everybody running around with secrets

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  i was talking to eitrigg a few days ago and he mentioned his son lives near there, and knows blackrock mountain well, so he might be able to help investigate

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  OH COOL

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Oh fucking hell

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  me too

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Well apparently it means “I think I’ll go blab” in banshee-talk

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Our esteemed guild leader is a father.

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  Okay, so tl;dr, you’re still picking at the damn Mokvar thing, and what a shock, now Eitrigg is encouraging you in continuing to be a pain in the ass

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  …

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Here we go

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  Now listen to me because I’m only going to say this once

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  oh boy…

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  …

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Congratulations Omgipwnedurface

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  ok

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  YAH GRATS

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  ok

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Thats wonderful news

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  I don’t give a shit what Mokvar had gotten himself into.  By the time he got shown the door, he’d burned about fifteen bridges, and I’m past the point of caring why.  He’s dead.  And if he’s not dead, he might as well be, because he’s dead to ME

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  ok

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  WHAT???

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  So whatever hairbrained scheme you’ve got in mind, drop it.  Let it GO.  THE END

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  You really had to, huh?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  ^_^

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  he’s

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  WHAT

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  A bouncing baby girl, if I’m told correctly.

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona] … … … …

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I mean…seriously?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Well, to be fair, Warchief…

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  if you say so, sir

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  THATS AWESOME PWN

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  ok so obviously I must have been staring at an old god or something

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Dontrag and Utvoch haven’t logged on in weeks.  Jaina hasn’t been on as much lately.

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  because I MUST have gone insane and thought I just read that

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I need to amuse myself -somehow-.

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Mrs Pwnurface must be so excited

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh, I know, Gayle; at first I thought the news was too good to be true as well!

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  oh yes

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  yes PWN, let’s HEAR about mrs pwnurface

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  For fuck’s sake

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  HOW ABOUT HER PWN

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  You know what

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Again, out of fairness, Warchief, I’m not even lying.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  She’s DEAD, actually, if you must know

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  When Faranell told me, my first thought honestly was, “Oh, this is too good.”

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  OH YIKES

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Okay, so listen, after this, could you PLEASE zip it about the kid?

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  you’re spiritsdamned right she’s dead

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I was planning to try to keep this hush-hush for now

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh course, dear Warchief.

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  I’m so sorry Omgipnedurface

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Was it in childbirth

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Henceforth I will keep your secret locked away in the securest of figurative underground vaults as if it were a recalcitrant death knight.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  No, it was later

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  She got sick from a plague, basically

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  A plague?  Oh dear, it wasn’t one of ours, was it?

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  OH

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Oh dear

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  That is, rather…it -wasn’t- one of ours, certainly.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Since obviously we have long since stopped making plague.

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  WAIT HOW LONG AGO COULD THIS BE IF YOU’RE A NEW DAD

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  What plague, actually?  Did someone mention plague?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  That sounds ghastly to me.

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  YES

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Okay look

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  EXACTLY HOW LONG AGO

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Ick, plague, I say.  Blech!

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  How are -you- today, Spazzle?

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I’m going to go over this once and then have done with it, okay?

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  And YOU STFU ALREADY GAYLE

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  hey, don’t try to drag me into this

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  I’m in enough trouble already

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  oh oh I’m all ears

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  you’re on your own!

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh, drat.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  NOT UNLESS “EAR” IS THE NEW WORD FOR “MOUTH” AND I MISSED THE FUCKING MEMO OR SOMETHING

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  FINE

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Okay

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  I mean SERIOUSLY, WTF??

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So yeah, I’ve got a daughter

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  She’s not a newborn, she’s in her teens now, I just… let’s just say I just gained custody and leave it at that

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  Oh will you knock it the fuck OFF

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Custody, and awareness.

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  and the surprise daughter is a TEENAGER already too?!

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Have you not said enough already today?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh, never.  ^_^  But do continue.

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Oh congratulations

[Officer][LivinDeadGirl | Sylvanas]  Re-sealing the vault!  ^_^

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  Yeah, she is, and hey, check it out, she even got to be a teenager in real time, unlike some other people I could mention

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So yeah, she’s just in town for a little while now

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  That’s the long and the short of it, and if you don’t mind I’d rather not have to answer like a zillion questions about her

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  …

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  how is this the first I’m hearing about this??

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  YAH I CAN SEE HOW YOU’D WANT TO KEEP YOUR PRIVACY

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  Hey, listen, I didn’t even know about her until last week

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  If you don’t mind me asking one question though Omgiownedurface

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  oh aren’t you a prince

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  when Liadrin came breezing into town with a little bundle of WTF in tow

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Why is she only in town a little while

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, fine

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  wait a minute

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  liadrin???

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  And I promise I won’t pry any further

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  That much is simple, she’s going away to school, pretty much

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  THAT stick figure?  are you KIDDING me??

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Oh

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  NOT LIKE THAT FOR FUCK’S SAKE

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Well I’m sure youll miss her

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, I’m sure

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  But its important sometimes to give your children that push off the ledge and hope they fly

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  Liadrin found her in Silvermoon after she got kicked out of Dalaran for being half orcish

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  You cant protect them from everything however much you might want to

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  UM RED

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  wait, HALF orcish? what’s the other half then? because I swear if you slept with a human I think I’ll scream

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Sometimes theyre going to get hurt

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Or captured

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Or mutated into monstrosities

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  YOU FUCKING FUCKED MEDIVH, who the fuck are you to criticize?!

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  RED

[EdwardBear | Ji] has logged off.

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  And then you have to authorize their extermination for the greater good

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  I was young and into older men!

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  But thats parenting for you

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  RED CHECK YOUR WHISPERS

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  um, boss?

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  Well I was young and into draenei girls!

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  What were we talking about again

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Oh okay

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  …

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  !!!

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  What?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Incidentally, Honalee, is everything all right with Leslie?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I don’t mean to pry, but I’m not accustomed to seeing you online without her.

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  ok I need to log off for a few

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  I need to go stab something

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  YA SHE’S JUST BUSY WITH WORK THIS WEEK

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh?  Anything in particular?

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  WE WILL CONTINUE THIS LATER

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  NOT REALLY, JUST THE SAME STUFF SHE’S BEEN DOING THE LAST FEW WEEKS NOW

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  so… I’m afraid our furry companion has gone and done something rash

[Nightengayle | Garona] has logged off.

That player is not online.

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  Oh no, what did Fat Boy Slim do now?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I like to think I’ve been able to provide her with something of a supportive ear from time to time.  I’m more than happy to do the same for you, if you’d ever care to have a sounding board.

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  well… I think he may be about to skip town to head to blackrock mountain

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  Fucking hell

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Sometimes it can be helpful to air your thoughts with someone impartial.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I need to log.  Some things just came up here that I have to check on

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  You know, concerns for your significant other, anxieties, random specific details about her exact undertakings these days, including but not limited to key initiatives, dates, and locations.

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  I’m coming over, you can fill in the rest then

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I know, I know, it’s cliche.  But still.

You have logged off.

 

30 Days of Character Development #3: D&U

Posted in 30 Days of Character Development with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 12, 2014 by Garrosh Hellscream

[Each week, a post will profile one of the blog’s many supporting players.  (See the first profile for more details.)  Since I didn’t get around to posting a profile last week, this time around I’m making up for it with a double of sorts.  Feel free to chime in with recommendations for other characters you’d like to see more about!]

 

d-and-u_profileNamesDontrag and Utvoch

Occupation:  Horde infantry soldiers (ranks: Dontrag—Sergeant; Utvoch—Scout)

AgeDontrag—31; Utvoch—29

Class:  Warrior

Group affiliations:  Horde (members), Overlord Krom’gar’s army (former members)

Known relativesDontrag—Adrasa (sister), Ug’thok (nephew); Utvoch—Krila (aunt)

Earth Online notes:  D&U play EO with mains GilbertRose (Dontrag) and SteveKravitz (Utvoch), and are members of Garrosh’s guild <Warchief>.  Utvoch briefly changed his character’s name to “Dranosh,” but was roundly criticized for the name choice, because really.  He reversed the name change shortly thereafter.  Also, guildmate Sylvanas Windrunner appears to take particular amusement in baiting the duo into arguments about which of them is which.

First appearance:  “Visiting Zoram’gar” (first mention), “Underneath the bunker” (first full transcript appearance)

Key posts and plot points:

  • An unsuspecting Garrosh first encountered Dontrag and Utvoch at Silverwind Refuge in “Visiting Zoram’gar” and dispatched them to join Overlord Krom’gar’s forces in Stonetalon.  He would later encounter them during his investigation of Krom’gar’s operations in “Underneath the bunker” – featuring D&U in supporting roles in Mokvar’s first transcript.
    (D&U can be found in-game both at Silverwind Refuge and in the Deep Reaches beneath Krom’gar’s fortress.  In the latter instance, they’re joined by goblin questgiver Blastgineer Igore; blog readers may take a certain amusement in Igore’s quest-text commentary on our cerebrally challenged friends.)
  • After Krom’gar’s “dismissal,” D&U remained stationed in Stonetalon, under the command of newly appointed Overlord Cliffwalker.  They were frequently recalled to Orgrimmar and other locations for various missions, but remained officially assigned to Cliffwalker in Stonetalon prior to their dispatch to Pandaria.
  • Evidently, according to a letter from D&U in one mailbag, Utvoch has (or had) enrolled in some extension courses, including diplomatic writing.  Academic records from the undertaking have not been released.  At one point, Utvoch convinced Dontrag to take a class with him, but the pair failed the course when they were caught handing in the same paper.  To the same instructor.  Yes, really.
  • Utvoch – sans Dontrag – traveled to old Hillsbrad, ten years in the past, with Garrosh, Mokvar, Liadrin, and Faranell during the Anti-Plague of Southshore storyline.  Like the other members of the group, Utvoch later found himself trapped between two fluctuating timelines; Garrosh and Mokvar noted, with no small degree of amusement, that this situation likely led to many confusing discussions between Utvoch and Dontrag.
  • Utvoch met and befriended Taktani in Mulgore just before she started writing in to Garrosh’s mailbag; Dontrag would meet her as well not long after.  Since Taktani’s arrival in Pandaria, Garrosh has charged D&U with keeping an eye on Tak and generally helping her navigate the complexities of the adult world, a job that Utvoch appears to have taken to somewhat more enthusiastically than Dontrag has.
  • Many people, Garrosh prime among them, frequently lose track of who is Dontrag and who is Utvoch – which is actually rather peculiar, given that they don’t really look very much alike.  Sylvanas, in guild chat, seems to understand which of them is which, but deliberately baits them into arguments on the subject anyway.
  • Regular readers will be well aware of Garrosh’s habit of giving people (often dismissive) nicknames.  Dontrag and Utvoch are among his most frequent targets; some of his favorites for them include the Dumbass Duo, Ketchup and Mustard, and the Wonder Twins.

In their own words:

dontragutvoch

Describe your relationship with your mother or your father or both.  Was it good?  Bad?  Were you spoiled rotten, ignored?  Do you still get along now, or no?

I didn’t know my father.  I think he was killed in the attack on Shattrath.  I got along pretty well with my mother, though.  She always used to tell me how I could be anything I wanted to be and accomplish anything I set my mind to.  Then I started working with the trainers and she had her first parent conference.  After that she mostly saved the thing about being whatever you want for my sister.  –Dontrag

I don’t really remember my parents.  They both died in the first war after the Dark Portal opened.  My aunt ended up raising me until I was old enough to fend for myself.  –Utvoch

How vain are you?  Do you find yourself attractive?

I guess I was a little vain for a while, during that year in the Barrens when I was trying to get away with the comb-over.  I started losing my hair early and it took a while for me to accept that I wasn’t fooling anyone.  –Dontrag

I don’t think I’m bad looking or anything, but I don’t really think I’m anything special.  Luckily I spend most of my time hanging out with this guy, so I figure I must end up looking like at least a 7.  –Utvoch

What are your most prominent physical features?

My thick, full head of hair.  –Utvoch

Screw you, Ut.  –Dontrag

Name one scar you have, and tell us where it came from.  If you don’t have any, is there a reason?

Well, I’ve got this one scar on my forehead, on the right side.  I was trying to explain which of us was which that time in Karazhan, and, um…well, the Warchief kind of got impatient and backhanded me. –Dontrag

C7_4-2

I’ve got one across my left cheek.  It’s just above the line of my beard, so I don’t think you would really notice it unless you were looking for it.  I got it when I got those people killed by that yeti in Hillsbrad because I accidentally went out of my way to kill a giant moth, and the Warchief got really mad and belted me.  Although the worst part was how he yelled.  He got that tone that he gets.  –Utvoch

Oh, yeah, I’ve got one on my face, too, right under my left eye, from that time the Warchief—  Wait a minute, when you said to name them, did you mean you wanted us to name them name them?  In that case, I think I’ll call the one under my eye Al.  –Dontrag

I think I’ll name mine Dranosh.  It means “Heart of Draenor” in orcish.  –Utvoch

Everybody knows that, you idiot.  And it’s still not cool to use that name.  Anyway, for the one on my forehead, maybe I’ll name that one The Reminder.  –Dontrag

I don’t get it.  But I love the idea of a name that’s “The” something.  I have to remember that if I ever have kids.  –Utvoch

What does your desk/workspace look like?  Are you neat or messy?

Depends on which of us used it last.  I try to keep our desk sort of organized back at the barracks.  Donty’s a slob, though.  I always end up having to pick up after him.  It’s like having a second job half the time.  –Utvoch

Depends on which of us used it last.  It’s not so much that I’m messy, really – it’s more me being lazy.  I don’t care enough to put in the extra effort to put everything in order.  And I mean, I would if I had to, but I figured out a long time ago that Ut’s compulsive enough that if I just leave it alone, he’ll do it eventually himself.  So, like, it’s not so much that I’m messy as I delegate well.  –Dontrag

Do you have any irrational fears?

Other than the Warchief getting a little madder than usual one day and stabbing me?  Fire makes me antsy.  I always get nervous around fire mages.  Or mages casting fireballs in general.  I always get this weird creepy feeling like I’m about to get torched–Dontrag

Owls freak me out.  Not even, like, giant ones, either.  Although those are even freakier.  Just plain old regular owls.  The way they stare at you, and plus, when they go “who!”, I always feel like they’re mocking me and Donty.  –Utvoch

If you could time travel, where would you go?

Probably old Hillsbrad, since I didn’t get to go last time, just to see what the big deal was.  –Dontrag

Maybe back to that time we went back to old Hillsbrad, and let Donty go instead?  That whole thing was really confusing, and I think the Warchief got even madder with me than usual, and plus there was that whole thing with the end of the world, which wasn’t a whole lot of fun.  –Utvoch

What might your ideal romantic partner be?

I won’t lie.  I’ve always had a thing for tauren women.  Can’t resist them.  (It’s the hooves.)  –Utvoch

You are a sick, sick orc, Ut.  –Dontrag

Spazzle Speaks: Tours of Duty

Posted in Spazzle Speaks, Transcripts with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 31, 2013 by Garrosh Hellscream

earthonline2

A little Earth Online interlude while Garrosh spins his yarn from Pandaria…

 

You have logged on.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Interesting.  What kind of research, Leslie?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  hi baddie

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  Hey mon.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  its really pretty technical

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  HI MRBADCRUMBLE

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  hey everyone

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  probably pretty boring if its not what you do

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  hey

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Greetings, Spazzle.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  i can try to explain some of it to you if you think it would help.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  hey

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh I’m sure it’s fascinating.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  lol prof

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  I just got back from the echo isles a little while ago

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  i’ve got a handle on it, prof, its my job after all

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  If you’d care to elaborate, of course.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Certainly no intrusion intended if you prefer not to.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  working on Jaina again?

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  Tanks for checkin’ up on it for me, mon.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  well yes, but i would imagine understanding the nielas vector hypothesis would be part of your job, too, and we’ve already established you don’t really have a handle on that.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Everyone needs a hobby.  ^_^

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  omg i do too

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  it’s fine

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  u think your right about everything

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  I had some business down there anyway

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  oh hardly.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  i know my nielas vectors, though.

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  hey

[Lorthemar] has logged on.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  look, i supervise mages for a living, i would think i know about nielas vectors

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  i would think you’d know about them, too.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  so see?  i’m not always right.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  ugh whatever

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  hi lor

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  just had to be careful not to be seen by any kor’kron on the way

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  Hey, Lor mon.

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  I STILL WANT TO KNOW HOW YOU KNOW ALL THIS STUFF PROF

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  i’ve said before, i read a lot.

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Greetings, all!

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  brb

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  You run into any trouble?

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  HI LOR

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Good evening, Lor’themar.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  not really

[Guild][Lorthemar]  And how is everyone this fine evening?

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  hey lor’themar

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Good evening.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  doing ok

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  How are you settling in on…the Isle of Thunder, is it?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  just missing my baby

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Yes indeed.

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Not badly at all.  Setting up took some doing, but we had some good help on hand.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  there are more kor’kron in razor hill than there used to be

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  AWWW

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  It’s good you were able to get your internet connection working from there.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I know our…esteemed Warchief has been having stability issues.

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Oh?  I thought you two sat next to each other while you played.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Goodness, I just reread the last thing I said, and I must say it gave me quite the chuckle.  ^_^

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  I think after they rebuilt the inn, they used it as an excuse to ramp up security

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  not right now

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  At any rate, I know I would be lost without my connection.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  I’ve noticed you really seem to be online, like, ALL the time

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  WE USUALLY DO

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  i’m away on business for a little while

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  I don’t think I’ve logged on without you being here

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Well, that’s partly because, being undead, I don’t strictly need to sleep.

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Oh, I see

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Which frees up lots of online time.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  don’t you have work you need to do in the undercity, though?

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  Garrosh give ’em enough time, they be makin’ lots more places “secure.”

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  so for right now the game is a way for us to still hang out together a little

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Yes, but I just take it with me everywhere.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Some of the warlocks worked out a way to project a likeness of my computer screen onto a writing tablet I carry around – an Eye Pad of Kilrogg, they call it.

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  IT MAKES ME GLAD I STARTED PLAYING THIS GAME

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  anyway, I got down there without much trouble

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  The name, I will admit, is inelegant.  I may have marketing give it another pass.

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  EVEN IF I’M STILL KIND OF A NOOB

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  What’s da word from Trall?

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  Ji?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  its ok, sweetie, being a newbie might be a nice change of pace for you

[Guild][Lorthemar]  You know, it’s a funny coincidence, I’m doing some traveling for work as well.

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  I know how dat goes, mon.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  all clear so far

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  LOR’THEMAR

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Yes?

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  Dis game be a way for me ta talk ta people too.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  nobody seems to have noticed anything going on down there

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  oh wow small world

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  -Don’t- say any more about what you’re doing.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Improbable though it would seem, I don’t think she realizes who you really are.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  which is kind of weird, considering it’s been months since they took out the kor’kron occupation

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  Been tryin’ ta not talk too much fa real what wit I got a nasty sore troat dese days, mon.

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Yeah, don’t remind me.  I get that a lot.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Well, yes, there’s that.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  i hope you feel better, bobby

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  While Garrosh still be in Pandaria, Eitrigg be da one mindin’ da store in Orgrimmar

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  But you’re also wasting a potential tactical advantage if you give away too much around her.

[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] has earned the achievement [Grand Central Station]!

[EdwardBear | Ji] has earned the achievement [Grand Central Station]!

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  He be no friend a da changes Malkorok been makin’ in da Kor’kron.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  yeah

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  Hey, grats, mon!

[Officer][Lorthemar]  How do you mean?

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  I just wish things would get back to normal again

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  or more normal at least

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Congratulations, all!

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  sorry, leslie was running me and puff through an instance

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  THANKS DEAR

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  …Really?

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Really what?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  my pleasure sweetie =)

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  i didn’t see your tell till just now

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  Dey gonna get worse before dey get better, mon.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  yeah

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  ty leslie

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  it’s ok

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Has…nobody told you who Proudleslie is?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  yw eddie

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  I haven’t…

[Officer][Lorthemar]  No, who is she?

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  did you find anything out?

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  OH WOW ONE MORE BUBBLE AND I’LL LEVEL TOO

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  oh boy

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Proudleslie is Jaina Proudmoore.

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  I talked to thrall, yeah

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  next thing u know your going to be all grown up!

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  = )

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  had to be careful not to give away too much

[Officer][Lorthemar]  …

[Officer][Lorthemar]  She’s…she’s…  WHY??

[Officer][Lorthemar]  WHY would we let her be in the guild?

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  what did he say?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  then i can get you all geared up and ready for big people adventures!

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  Sylvanas convinced Garrosh to let her stay.

[Officer][Lorthemar]  By convincing him we’re living in Upside Down Crazy Land??

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  the easiest place for you to reach the earthen ring is at the twilight citadel

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  I APPRECIATE ALL THE TIME YOU’VE BEEN SPENDING HELPING ME LEVEL

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  most of their heavy hitters are still over at the maelstrom, but they usually don’t let just anyone over there

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  No, Regent-Lord, by pointing out that keeping her close, without her knowing who -we- are, puts us in a position to ply her for information that might be of use to us.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  how’s that been working out for you, by the way?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  aww, anything for my baby

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  ok

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Hush now.  It’s an ongoing project.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  At any rate, Lor’themar, please try to be careful what you say

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  so your best bet is to head down to the twilight highlands

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  i kinda like getting to take care of you here after everything you do for me

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  MY PLEASURE, M’LADY

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  they’ve been working on setting up again there since the twilight’s hammer was driven out

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina<3

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  what’s that?

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Ugh, fine.

[Officer][Lorthemar]  This is not good for my rage.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  aww thats my lil puffy magic dragon  =)

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  what’s what?

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  = )

[Officer][Lorthemar]  And of course Garrosh took the anger management counselor with him to Pandaria.

[Officer][Lorthemar]  To spite me, I’ll bet you anything.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  plus did i mention you look sexy as a fireman?

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  the twilight’s hammer

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  rawr  ;)

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  To be fair, keeping an anger management specialist close to Garrosh is probably a wise move.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  she’s kind of got you there

[Officer][Lorthemar]  *looks in guild chat*

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]  long story

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  i wish i could adequately impress upon you the sheer magnitude of the fact that you’re making *me* want to vomit.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  oh boo prof, havent u ever been in love before

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]  last year’s bad guys

[Officer][Lorthemar]  I can’t believe this woman is beating me.

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Anyway…

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  oh

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  as a matter of fact.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  what happened?

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Let’s talk about something else before I get too annoyed.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  the scourge.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  oh  =(

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  at any rate, i should log for now, i have some packing to do.

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  i really don’t know if it’s going to accomplish much going to them, though

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  Be seein’ ya, mon!

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  BYE PROF

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Hmm, speaking of which, do you know anything about what’s going on with Faranell?

[ProfHubert | Faranell] has logged off.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  sorry if i brought up bad memories prof

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  it’s worth a try

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I was going to ask you, actually.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  blah missed him

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  All I know is that he’s going to Orgrimmar at the request of your Lady Liadrin.

[Officer][Lorthemar]  That’s all I know as well.

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  if anyone will have any ideas about what happened to mokvar, it would be them

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Liadrin told me she was requesting Faranell from you, but was rather dodgy about details.

[Officer][Lorthemar]  I’d assumed she would have told you more.

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  i hate to say it, but i think we might already know what happened to mokvar

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Not particularly, only that she had need of his alchemical skills for some of her work with the Dalaran refugees.

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Don’t they have apothecaries in Orgrimmar?

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  Tons over in the Valley of Spirits.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I raised that point myself.  All she would say was that it’s a matter of some delicacy and she would prefer to call on someone she knows.

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  it’s possible mokvar is really gone

[Officer][Lorthemar]  It’s exhausting having our supposed underlings running around on their own like this.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Preaching to the choir, Regent-Lord.

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  if he is, and i go, then he won’t be any more gone, and all i’ll have done is waste some of my own time

[Officer][Lorthemar]  We need better minions.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  We really do.

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  if he’s not, and i don’t go, then it might cost us something more valuable

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  the only mistake would be not to act

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Hmm, guild chat is quiet.

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  believe me, I hope you find something.

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  I’m just trying not to get my hopes up

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Jaina and Kalecgos are probably talking in tells.

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  well either way, i should be back soon

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  i should get going

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  me too

[Officer][Lorthemar]  I wonder what they’re talking about that’s so secret.

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  talk to you soon

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  good luck

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Probably you.

You have logged off.

Spazzle Speaks: The Goblin is Always Greener on the Other Side of Guild Chat

Posted in Spazzle Speaks, Transcripts with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 3, 2013 by Garrosh Hellscream

earthonline10a

After Garrosh put up that guild chat log yesterday, I thought it might be helpful to see things from another perspective…

You have logged on.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  hi baddie

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  check the appendix, then.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  hi mrbadcrumble

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  it should be on a right-hand page, under a map if i recall.

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  Hey, mon.

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  hey everyone

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Good evening, Spazzle.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  hey sylvanas

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  ok ok fine, i know better than to argue with you about these things

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  hey, how are you feeling?

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  I DONT WANT TO IMAGINE HOW MUCH TIME YOU MUST HAVE SPENT IN LIBRARIES STUDYING THIS STUFF PROF

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  Better, mon.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  should I even ask what they’re arguing about this time?

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  if only you knew.

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  Chen say pretty soon I be healed up enough ta be back on ma feet an outta dis monastery.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Honestly, I’m not even sure how they got started.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  that’s good

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  ah

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  seriously you must be some kind of master wizard with everything you seem to know

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  Can’t happen soon enough, mon – don’ like dis sittin’ around.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  not really.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  so what are you working on?  are we about to get achievement spammed as usual?

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  i’m not particularly powerful as a caster; i just have a good handle on theory.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  yeah but you have to take care of yourself

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  YOU’D PROBABLY BE A GOOD TEACHER THEN

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Nothing imminent.  I’m laying the groundwork for some longer-term projects at the moment.

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  Any news from Trall?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  maybe thats why his name is professor! =)

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  meh.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  i think of it more as “professor” in the “mad scientist” sense.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  not last i heard

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  which is fitting, considering i spend most of my time in a laboratory developing biochemical agents of mass destruction.

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged on.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  haha yea right, your being sarcastic again

You whispered to [LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]:  have you talked to lorthemar?

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  When ya see ’im let ’im know I be dere as soon as I can, an den we deal wit’ Garrosh.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  drat, i’ve been caught.

[LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] whispered:  Speak the devil’s name…

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  hi pwn

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  Hey OmgipwneduMon!

[LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] whispered:  Oops, mistell.

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  Speak a da devil, mon.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Hey

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  hey boss

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Greetings, dear Warchief.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  is your connection any better pwn?

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I guess we’ll find out in a minute

You whispered to [LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]:  k good

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  lol

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged off.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  i really don’t like all this sneaking around

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  Haha!

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  omg

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  now see, for instance, i can’t work -that- kind of magic.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  i just deploy verbal irony; i can’t conjure it up in actual events.

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  Ya won’ need to much longer.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  i swear i didnt do that!

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged on.

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  Soon we’ll be makin’ our move.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  UGH

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  Leslie!  Do it again, mon!

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  WB PWN

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  i didnt do anything!

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I take it your connection is none too improved since last time, Warchief?

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  You put da connection voodoo on him, mon!

You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]:  still using the network grizzle set up for you?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, apparently

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Also that Bob guy is rubbing me the wrong way already

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered:  Yeah

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  On the topic of what you’ve been doing, Leslie, has work continued to be hectic?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  He’d better watch it before I end up stabbing him in the neck

You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]:  honestly, you might as well hire a couple extra tauren to send up smoke signals for your wifi

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  You were starting to say, but ended up being sidetracked by ProfHubert.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Speaking of me stabbing people, by the way, did you manage to get Lori straightened out?

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  BTW COULD I GET A GUILD INVITE FOR MY FRIEND

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  sure puff, just whisper me the name

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  ugh not really

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  If you’re referring to leadership of the guild, I think I’ve convinced him to be reasonable and pass it back

[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] whispered:  HER NAME IS LIVINGREDGIRL

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  He was quite agitated before.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  You know, not for anything, but didn’t we used to ask people to APPLY to this guild once upon a time?

You whispered to [HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]:  seriously?

[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] whispered:  ?

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  does it really matter?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  just some office politics i’m trying to stay out of mostly

You whispered to [HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]:  don’t you think that’s going to be a little confusing?

[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] whispered:  Y

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I don’t particularly care about his moods

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  does anyone in this guild actually do anything other than sit around in guild chat?

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged off.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  i do!

You whispered to [HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]:  because of how similar that is to LivinDeadGrl?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  me to!  just got my set bonus last night in fact

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  i’m level 52 now!

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  I mostly just hang out here in da capital cities, mon, an’ stir tings up in trade chat!

[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] whispered:  OH I DIDNT EVEN THINK OF THAT

[Lorthemar] has logged on.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  grats eddie

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  hi lorthemar

[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] whispered:  SHOULD I GET HER TO REROLL?

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  Somebody gotta be da resident smartass in dis guild, right?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  hi lor!

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  um, i have some bad news for you…

You whispered to [HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]:  no, she already has this toon… I just hope she doesn’t get a lot of mis-tells

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Greetings, all!

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  hey lor

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Hello, Lor’themar.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  lol

You whispered to [HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]:  I’ll send her an invite

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Hail, Spazzle.  Dark Lady.

[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] whispered:  TY

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  yea bobby, prof has seniority on you

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  if only you knew.

You have invited [LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza] to the guild.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Lor’themar, I should probably warn you straight away…

[LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza] has joined the guild.

[LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza] has been promoted to the rank Recruit.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  he spends most of his time in-game making sarcastic comments to people

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Welcome, LivingRedGirl!

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  welcome red!

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged on.

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  there you go!  welcome to the guild!

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  in point of fact, that’s not actually specific to in-game.

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Thank you all

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  lol

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  wb pwn

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So as I was saying. I don’t care if Ponytail is happy about it as long as he manages to get his panties unbunched long enough to hand over guild control

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Garrosh was just on and will likely be back momentarily, so please try to humor him.

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  Garrosh be runnin’ outta friends fast.

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered:  Oh and by the way

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Hello, Garrosh…

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh drat.  Two seconds too slow hitting return.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Oh and LOOK who’s here now

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  yeah, but I’m *one* of his friends

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh goodness, LivingRedGirl, you look almost just like me!

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered:  Do you want to explain to me why I never heard a word from you about the whole Mokvar fiasco?

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Haha looks like it yes

You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]:  um

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Good evening, Warchief.

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered:  YES UM

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  At any rate, Leslie…

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, yeah, good evening, good morning, happy new year, whatever

You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]:  I guess I figured you were already getting updates from people more important than me

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I know office politics can be precarious, Leslie.  I’m not unfamiliar with them myself.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Are you ready to stop fucking around and put me back in place as guild leader?

You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]:  and I was probably still hoping there would be some explanation for everything

[Officer][Lorthemar]  While I still have my objections to the way you’ve been conducting yourself toward me and my people, Garrosh…

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  Ya ever stop ta ask yaself why, mon?

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered:  At this point I don’t particularly CARE about why

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  mostly just a coworker trying to drag me into his conflicts

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Or am I going to have to smack a bitch up first?

You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]:  look, I understand why you’re doing what you’re doing

[Officer][Lorthemar]  …case in point.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  The bitch being you, by the way

[Officer][Lorthemar]  *sigh*

[Officer][Lorthemar]  In any case…I don’t want to hurt the guild over our personal squabbles.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  ugh hang on

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Ah, interesting…

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  That’s refreshingly non-suicidal for you, Eyepatch

[Officer][Lorthemar]  So, yes, here.

You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]:  with the mokvar thing

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has been promoted to the rank Guild Leader.

You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]:  it’s just hard for me to accept a friend going off the deep end, is all

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  GRATS PWN

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged off.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  ok that could have been ugly

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Is there anything particular to this conflict your coworker is trying to involve you in, Leslie?

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  Dis is way too entertainin’.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  anyway, like I was saying

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Or is it more along the lines of your typical…in-office sparring?

[Officer][Lorthemar]  I almost feel bad for him.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  i tried to warn him about getting his network set up

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  1 SEC SHE HAD TO AFK

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  but oh no, he sees a goblin and just figures “catch-all tech genius”

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Ah, I see.  No rush.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  since it appears most of my best sources of entertainment are away or disconnecting, i suppose i should go get some work done

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  look, I understand why you’re doing what you’re doing

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Be well, ProfHubert!

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  later prof

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  in my absence, bob, feel free to take over as interim satirist

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  Hah, tanks mon.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  just try not to stage some kind of sardonic coup while i’m away

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  Haha, no promises, mon.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  bye prof

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged on.

[Guild][MrBadCrumble | Spazzle]  bye prof

[ProfHubert | Faranell] has logged off.

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  Welcome back, mon!  We missed ya!

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  WB AGAIN PWN

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  and I’m helping thrall because, well, he’s thrall, and I don’t think it’s right the way the trolls are being treated

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Welcome back Omgipwnedurface

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  UGH UGH UGH

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  wish I could do something to fix it, chief

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, I know

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  but I think you may be kind of stuck with it until you get back or orgrimmar

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  In all honesty, Warchief, the fact that you’re having such connection difficulties at the moment may be a reason not to resume control of the guild just yet…

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I’m not sure there’s much to be gained from a guild leader who’s unable to be online to tend to the responsibilities of leadership.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  but that’s as far as I can go

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, I hate to say it, but you might have a point

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  And frankly it’s getting way too annoying trying to stay on

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I can well imagine.

You whispered to [Bob | Vol’jin]:  I won’t stab him in the back

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So yeah, let me do this

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] has been promoted to the rank Guild Leader.

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  GRATS MRBADCRUMBLE

[Guild][Bob | Vol’jin]  Hey, grats, mon!

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Does leadership always change hands so often in the guild

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  whoa seriously?

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  NOT REALLY

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  Ya got ta listen to ya conscience, mon.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  He already has control of the web site and he’s got the best handle on all the nuts and bolts

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  WELL MAYBE LATELY YEAH

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So just as well to let him mind the shop for now

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  A wise decision, of course, sir.

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Congratulations, Spazzle.

[Bob | Vol’jin] whispered:  I hope it’ll let ya sleep if tings go bad.

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered:  Also because, even with the Mokvar thing, you’re the only one of these clowns I actually trust

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  thanks lor

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Okay, so…

You whispered to [Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]:  thanks chief

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I’m going to empty my mail just in case, and then log off here before something else pisses me off

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Of course, sir.

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered:  And I get why you kept quiet

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  It’s gotten quiet

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered:  But let me make this clear

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  THAT USUALLY MEANS THE OFFICERS ARE TALKING

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered:  Mokvar is dead to me

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Oh

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered:  And if I ever find out where he’s run off to, he’s a dead man

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I know it can be a bit unnerving.

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  hey

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] whispered:  Anyway…later

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  hi spazzle

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  you haven’t heard anything from mokvar, have you?

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I wasn’t sure what to make of it myself when I first joined the guild.

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has logged off.

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Are you new

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  not since he ran off

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  why?

[Guild][Lorthemar]  …

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  oh hi lorthemar

[Guild][Lorthemar]  No.

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  this is bad

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  did you join recently?

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  this is really bad

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  Me

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  what?

[Guild][Lorthemar]  …

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  no, i could swear i’ve seen you before

[Guild][LivingRedGirl | Alexstrasza]  I only just joined a few minutes ago

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  you remember the recall totem I told you about?  the one he left me to hold?

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  lorthemar seems new though

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  yes

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I…

[Officer][Livindeadgrl | Sylvanas]  Perhaps you just have one of those faces?

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I believe I need to log off and step away from the game for a bit.

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  the spirit link that a shaman makes with these totems makes them give off a green glow

[Guild][Lorthemar]  It’s not good for my rage.

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  it jsut went out

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  i’m sorry if i upset you, lorthemar

[Lorthemar] has logged off.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  oh bother

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  oh

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  back

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  that’s bad?

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  yeah

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  sorry

[Guild][Livindeadgrl | Sylvanas]  Welcome back, Leslie.

[Guild][Livindeadgrl | Sylvanas]  Now where were we?

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  the only reason the totem would go out like that is if mokvar were dead

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  sorry livindead, i cant right now

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  but he can just wake up again, right?  like last time?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  i just came back to say bye and log

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  theres stuff happening here rl and i need to go

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  no, not like ‘waiting for my ankh to kick in’ dead

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  and so does puffy

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  like for real dead

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  like right now

[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] has logged off.

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  oh dear

[Guild][MrBadCrumble | Spazzle]  actually i need to run too

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  I need to go

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Is everything all right, Spazzle?

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  I have to check on this

[Officer][MrBadCrumble | Spazzle]  no

You have logged off.

I hate wireless networks

Posted in Transcripts with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 2, 2013 by Garrosh Hellscream

earthonline10

Here’s another example why.

You have logged on.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  haha yea right, your being sarcastic again

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  drat, i’ve been caught.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  hi pwn

[Guild][Bob]  Hey OmgipwneduMon!

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Hey

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  hey boss

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Greetings, dear Warchief.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  is your connection any better pwn?

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I guess we’ll find out in a minute

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  lol

You have been disconnected.

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You have logged on.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  UGH

[Guild][Bob]  Leslie!  Do it again, mon!

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  WB PWN

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  i didnt do anything!

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I take it your connection is none too improved since last time, Warchief?

[Guild][Bob]  You put da connection voodoo on him, mon!

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  still using the network grizzle set up for you?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, apparently

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Also that Bob guy is rubbing me the wrong way already

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  Yeah

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  On the topic of what you’ve been doing, Leslie, has work continued to be hectic?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  He’d better watch it before I end up stabbing him in the neck

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  honestly, you might as well hire a couple extra tauren to send up smoke signals for your wifi

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  You were starting to say, but ended up being sidetracked by ProfHubert.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Speaking of me stabbing people, by the way, did you manage to get Lori straightened out?

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  BTW COULD I GET A GUILD INVITE FOR MY FRIEND

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  sure puff, just whisper me the name

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  ugh not really

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  If you’re referring to leadership of the guild, I think I’ve convinced him to be reasonable and pass it back

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  He was quite agitated before.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  You know, not for anything, but didn’t we used to ask people to APPLY to this guild once upon a time?

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  does it really matter?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  just some office politics i’m trying to stay out of mostly

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I don’t particularly care about his moods

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  does anyone in this guild actually do anything other than sit around in guild chat?

You have been disconnected.

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You have logged on.

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  there you go!  welcome to the guild!

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  in point of fact, that’s not actually specific to in-game.

[Guild][LivingRedGirl]  Thank you all

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  lol

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  wb pwn

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So as I was saying.  I don’t care if Ponytail is happy about it as long as he manages to get his panties unbunched long enough to hand over guild control

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Garrosh was just on and will likely be back momentarily, so please try to humor him.

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  Oh and by the way

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Hello, Garrosh…

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh drat.  Two seconds too slow hitting return.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] Oh and LOOK who’s here now

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh goodness, LivingRedGirl, you look almost just like me!

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  Do you want to explain to me why I never heard a word from you about the whole Mokvar fiasco?

[Guild][LivingRedGirl]  Haha looks like it yes

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  um

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Good evening, Warchief.

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  YES UM

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  At any rate, Leslie…

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, yeah, good evening, good morning, happy new year, whatever

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  I guess I figured you were already getting updates from people more important than me

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I know office politics can be precarious, Leslie.  I’m not unfamiliar with them myself.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Are you ready to stop fucking around and put me back in place as guild leader?

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  and I was probably still hoping there would be some explanation for everything

[Officer][Lorthemar]  While I still have my objections to the way you’ve been conducting yourself toward me and my people, Garrosh…

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  At this point I don’t particularly CARE about why

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  mostly just a coworker trying to drag me into his conflicts

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Or am I going to have to smack a bitch up first?

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  look, I understand why you’re doing what you’re doing

[Officer][Lorthemar]  …case in point.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  The bitch being you, by the way

[Officer][Lorthemar]  *sigh*

[Officer][Lorthemar]  In any case…I don’t want to hurt the guild over our personal squabbles.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Ah, interesting…

[Officer][Lorthemar]  So, yes, here.

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  with the mokvar thing

[Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh] has been promoted to the rank Guild Leader.

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  it’s just hard for me to accept a friend going off the deep end, is all

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  GRATS PWN

You have been disconnected.

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You have logged on.

[Guild][MrBadCrumble | Spazzle]  bye prof

[ProfHubert | Faranell] has logged off.

[Guild][Bob]  Welcome back, mon!  We missed ya!

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  WB AGAIN PWN

[Guild][LivingRedGirl]  Welcome back Omgipwnedurface

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  UGH UGH UGH

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  wish I could do something to fix it, chief

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, I know

[Lorthemar] whispered:  Now that we’ve settled the guild issue, Warchief…

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  but I think you may be kind of stuck with it until you get back or orgrimmar

[Lorthemar] whispered:  Well…can we talk man to man?

You whispered to [Lorthemar]:  Yeah okay

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  In all honesty, Warchief, the fact that you’re having such connection difficulties at the moment may be a reason not to resume control of the guild just yet…

[Lorthemar] whispered:  Well, concerning the goings-on in Pandaria…

You whispered to [Lorthemar]:  Actually, I don’t know.  CAN we?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I’m not sure there’s much to be gained from a guild leader who’s unable to be online to tend to the responsibilities of leadership.

[Lorthemar] whispered:  …

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, I hate to say it, but you might have a point

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  And frankly it’s getting way too annoying trying to stay on

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I can well imagine.

[Lorthemar] whispered:  Never mind.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So yeah, let me do this

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] has been promoted to the rank Guild Leader.

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  GRATS MRBADCRUMBLE

[Guild][Bob]  Hey, grats, mon!

You whispered to [Lorthemar]:  Whatever, Lori

[Guild][LivingRedGirl]  Does leadership always change hands so often in the guild

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  whoa seriously?

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  NOT REALLY

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  He already has control of the web site and he’s got the best handle on all the nuts and bolts

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  WELL MAYBE LATELY YEAH

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So just as well to let him mind the shop for now

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  A wise decision, of course, sir.

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Congratulations, Spazzle.

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  Also because, even with the Mokvar thing, you’re the only one of these clowns I actually trust

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  thanks lor

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Okay, so…

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispers:  thanks chief

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I’m going to empty my mail just in case, and then log off here before something else pisses me off

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Of course, sir.

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  And I get why you kept quiet

[Guild][LivingRedGirl]  It’s gotten quiet

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  But let me make this clear

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  THAT USUALLY MEANS THE OFFICERS ARE TALKING

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  Mokvar is dead to me

[Guild][LivingRedGirl]  Oh

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  And if I ever find out where he’s run off to, he’s a dead man

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I know it can be a bit unnerving.

You whispered to [MrBadCrumble | Spazzle]  Anyway…later

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I wasn’t sure what to make of it myself when I first joined the guild.

You have logged off.

Monday mailbag

Posted in Mailbag with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 13, 2013 by Garrosh Hellscream

mail19

So I was finally able to get a decent internet connection going again, long enough to get my mail sorted out, and I figured since I have a decent bunch of letters from you peeps, and I haven’t offered any mailbag love for a while, I might as well do just that.  Because you know me – your Warchief is nothing if not all about the love.

 

Hail, Warchief!

It’s my first weekend back in Silvermoon in I don’t know how long, and man, is the mood different around here these days. Whether you’re going to think that’s good news or bad news depends on how you interpret that.

Remember my first letter? The one where I was basically advocating high treason against the Regent-Lord? A lot of us used to be dissatisfied that he was doing a whole bunch of nothing. The impression around here, at least if you believe the spin from the Silvermoon Star-Tribune, is that the Regent-Lord’s approval numbers are way up since he started getting jiggy with it down in Pandaria. Yes, the Star-Tribune is calling what Lor’themar’s doing down there “decisive leadership” and “proactive management”. And the public seems to be buying it.

Either that, or they’re just glad that he’s somewhere else, and hoping he eats a Mogu hammer somewhere along the way. That’s the other way to look at it.

To be honest, I’m not sure which one I’m buying, yet. That’s something I’ll have to think about when I get back to Pandaria.

–A Concerned Citizen

Hey, ACC.  You know, my first reaction here is that people probably ARE a little happier about Lori because he’s been away.  Problem is, if that were true, you’d think that I would start finding him less annoying since he’s gone BACK to Silvermoon recently.  But…nope.  He high-tailed it out of Pandaria, then promptly made a big ol’ cluster fuck of that whole business with the sha box…and the less said about the sideshow going on in my Earth Online guild, the better.  I suppose it’s still a LITTLE less irritating, but only because I don’t have to listen to him live and in person.  At least until he comes strolling back down here again.

Also, not for nothing, but are you sure the reports in your little dorky newspaper are reliable?  Who’s doing the writing?  It’s amazing what a little propaganda can do for a ruler’s perception.  Or so I’ve heard.

 

Dear Warchief,

I’ve been following some of your interactions with Lord Theron and I was wondering if you limited your observations to him or if you think all Blood Elves are like that.

I’ve been in Pandaria just about since the beginning (but I can’t explain how Anduin got away–that was General Nazgrim’s job, not mine) and have tried to do my part for the Horde.  Also: Pandaren don’t seem to have barbers.  Anywhere.  Not a one on this damn continent.  You should give us credit for coming here anyways even with that sacrifice.

Respectfully,

–Vyrin Dawnstar, Shrine of Two Moons, Pandaria

P.S: If anyone told you about Anduin and the Temple of the Red Crane, I deny it all.  Not me.  Nope.  Must’ve been someone else helping him.  If that hasn’t been brought to your attention yet, please ignore this part.

Hmm…  Well, Vyrin, I guess that depends on what you mean by “all blood elves are like that.”  I mean, like what?  Spindly and break-easy-ish?  Because, well, sorry, but you guys kind of are.  A little too preoccupied with the uber-luxurious hair?  I refer you to your second paragraph.  (By the by, I think the lack of barbers in Pandaria is because the pandas just shed.  Can you imagine the cleanup crews you’d need in Silvermoon if the elves were like that?)  That said, I DON’T think all blood elves are like ol’ Eyepatch in the absolutely-completely-utterly-useless department.  I mean, Lady Liadrin has always struck me as pretty sharp and on top of things, and…um…okay, give me a minute here, I’m sure I can come up with a second example.

Hang on.

Um…

Okay, I’m going to have to get back to you on this, but seriously, I’ve got a…reasonably strong suspicion there’s at least one more I can name.

Also, though, what?  Anduin at the Temple of the Red Crane?  I’ve heard some scouting reports about that Red Crane place, actually.  I may have to do some followup on that place…

 

My Dearest Warchief,

That scar on your lip is so sexy. It makes you look very manly and tough. I’ve been wondering though how you got it. I’m sure there is some extraordinary tale of bravery and valor associated with it. I’d like to hear it.

Your devoted admirer,

–Wega

Hoo boy.  Here we go again with Wega.  So…yeah… For those of you who maybe haven’t noticed, Wega is talking about the scar I have on the right side of my upper lip:

scar

So, okay, I know you’d probably figure I got the scar from some glorious battle, or one of the times I’ve squared off with Varian, or something else like that, but as it turns out, it was really more of a fluke injury.  One night about a year and a half ago, give or take, I was trying to reorganize some of my junk in Grommash Hold, and I was stashing a couple boxes of stuff on a high shelf.  While I was stretching up to reach the shelf, I lost my footing and fell over.  Now, ordinarily that wouldn’t have been a big deal, except it just so happened that Mortimer was there with me, and was curled up on the floor sound asleep.  Until I slipped and fell, and landed right on top of him, and he was so startled that before he knew what was going on, he snapped at me.  And, yeah, got a nice chunk of my lip.

So, that was fun.

Gotta say, though, in a way it was kind of endearing afterward – once Mortimer knew what was going on, he DID act all sad and apologetic, and spent the next few days following me around trying to make nice.  Once again, wyverns are better people than most people.

Now granted, having my lip cut open by wyvern fangs wasn’t exactly fun, but depending on how you look at it, I still don’t think I’ve gotten the worst of it from Mortimer.  That honor probably goes to Malkorok.  A few weeks ago, I was talking to Malkorok while I was getting ready to leave the Sanctum of Two Moons, then walked past him to the landing platform out front.  Mortimer was following along behind me, and just as he was passing Malkorok, Mortimer stopped, lifted one leg up…and fucking peed on him.  Oh man, you should have seen the look on Malky’s face.  Especially when I pointed out, “Dude, considering what that usually signifies for a wyvern, you LITERALLY just got owned.”

Heh.

Hehehe.

<snort>

 

Mr. Garrosh, sir!

I want to thank you for helping us DPS kids and, you know, stuff.

I have a question though.

What happened to all your hair? I saw pictures of you and you had hair at one time, but now you don’t. Do you plan to grow your hair again? How would you wear it?

–Ruekie, Shaman-in-Training, Domination Point

What is this, fucking “Everybody Ask Garrosh to Explain His Personal Appearance Week”?

Oh, wait, hang on, it’s one of the kids.

What is this, blankety-blank “Everybody Ask Garrosh to Explain His Personal Appearance Week”?  You kids – DO NOT read that first part from a couple lines up, YOU UNDERSTAND ME?

Anyway, yeah, Ruekie, I used to have a ponytail, right up through my time in Northrend.  I wore my hair like that going all the way back to when I was a kid.  To tell you the truth, it was pretty much the best of iffy options, as far as something I could do with my hair that would look maybe-sorta decent.  See, while Grom had a really thick, full mane of hair, I guess I must have gotten mine from my mom’s side of the family, because my hair was always fairly coarse and stringy and just…patchy all over my scalp.  Even as a kid, I pretty much had the beginnings of male pattern baldness going.  And really, it shouldn’t come as that much of a surprise that I wouldn’t have that great of a head of hair – you know the old saying, grass doesn’t grow on a busy street.

Anyway, the ponytail was just a way to yank it all together that didn’t look flat-out terrible.  Eventually, when I moved to Orgrimmar, I figured the hell with it and just cut it off.  Which first of all, is much more low-maintenance.  No more spending ten minutes every morning tugging it all together and trying to bind it up and then having the band be too loose so you start feeling it slipping out little by little all morning, or getting that one strand caught halfway through the pull-through and then feeling your roots getting pulled every time you look to one side, or…ugh, yeah, whatever.  Way easier this way.  Not to mention it’s way more practical in battle – it’s one less thing to get caught somewhere, and one less way for an enemy to grab you from behind.

Besides, much better to just embrace the baldness and go with it, rather than try to compensate with something that looks maybe-not-quite-terrible-if-you-squint-a-little.  This way, it just announces to the world, “Yes, I’m bald.  DEAL WITH IT.”  Confidence is very sexy, don’t you think?

(Maybe I shouldn’t have put it that way.  I can hear Wega scribbling out another letter as we speak…)

 

Heya Garrosh,

Cool little web form you have here.  Sometimes those techie goblins do have some good ideas.  (Not often, but sometimes.)

Anywho, my question for you this week is this: If you were to retire from warchiefin’ tomorrow, who would you choose as your successor and why?

Thanks!

–Kaija

You know, Kaija, this is actually a pretty decent question.  For all the good things about the Horde, we don’t really have a clear line of succession.  I mean, obviously if I were going to retire – presumably years down the road when I’m a gray-haired (FIGURE OF SPEECH, RUEKIE, DON’T GET EXCITED) old man basking in the triumphant glow of my many glorious victories – I would be in a position to sit back, think it over, and pick out an appropriate successor as Warchief.  But what if something happens before I have the chance to?  What if I get sick or injured?  What if somebody decides it would be a bright idea to throw me a surprise party for my 70th birthday, and the ol’ ticker finally gives out?  What if – I know this is a long shot, but still – what if I die in battle somehow before we even get to the wrinkly stage?  What then?  WHAT THEN, I ASK YOU?

So, it’s probably not a bad idea to put a little thought into who a good successor would be, and maybe establish that that person is next in line, just in case something happens.

And then, you know, make it very clear to that person that I’ve left the Kor’kron with special instructions to follow in the event that I should die under circumstances that are in any way even remotely fishy.  Such instructions including, but not limited to, the agonizingly slow execution of the successor, their siblings, their friends, their relatives, their next-door neighbors, and anyone who’s ever been seen being polite to them in public.

You know.  Just FYI.

Anyway, we might as well be systematic about this, so I’m going to review some of the likely candidates to follow me as Warchief – and just for shits and giggles, I’m going to group them into suitable categories and even give my best estimate at their odds of getting the nod.  Place your bets now.

 

THE “OH SNAP DID I SAY THAT” DIVISION

VOL’JIN
1,000,000 to 1

Not really an option, because guess what, bitches?  HE’S DEAD.  HAHAHA <snort> that cracks me up more than it probably should.

 

THE “I GUESS I’M OBLIGATED TO AT LEAST MENTION THEM” DIVISION 

JASTOR GALLYWIX
999,995 to 1

I mean…I guess he’s technically leader of the Bilgewater goblins, but… Well, like, does anybody even know where the fuck he IS half the time?  I’m pretty sure the only times I’ve ever seen him were at the meeting of Horde leaders to prepare for the Theramore attack, and the celebration in Orgrimmar afterward.  And, well, with the meeting, I pretty much sent notices to every goblin I could think of and then crossed my fingers hoping that word would reach him.  And at the celebration…yeah, mountains of free food and booze, so of course he was going to show up for that.  Honestly, I don’t get why the guy’s so low-profile.  He had a fucking pleasure palace built in Azshara, and you can’t even find him THERE.  Believe you me, if I ever commissioned the construction of Garrosh’s Pleasure Palace, you could call off the search parties, my ass would be there.

Hmm.  Hang on a second, I need to jot something down on next month’s agenda planner.

 

LOR’THEMAR THERON
500,000 to 1

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA… Yeah, sure, this guy as Warchief.  Do I really even need to elaborate here?  Come on.

 

SYLVANAS WINDRUNNER
200,000 to 1

You know, she would actually be a pretty strong candidate – to her credit, she IS intelligent, charismatic, and competent – if she didn’t creep the living FUCK out of everyone.  Not to mention make you worry that she might then replace that aforementioned living fuck with some kind of weird-ass UNDEAD fuck under her control.

 

BAINE BLOODHOOF
150,000 to 1

He’s a great warrior, he takes good care of his people, and you can practically see Cairne when you look in his eyes (not that that makes me at all awkward, no sir).  He’s also freaking Vol’jin Lite what with the bitching and the moaning and the OMG Garrosh how could you.  Because if there’s one thing you don’t want to stand for, it’s actually GOING TO WAR with the people you are ALLEGEDLY AT WAR WITH.  Last thing the Horde needs is a fucking carebear in charge.  And Thrall me no Thralls – Guy Smiley sat on his hands way too much too.

 

THE “I BET YOU DIDN’T THINK I KNEW ABOUT THIS MEME” DIVISION 

A BASIC CAMPFIRE
5000 to 1

HAHA SEE I BET YOU ASSHOLES DIDN’T THINK I HAD A SENSE OF HUMOR ABOUT THAT SHIT.

 

THE “DIDN’T YOU RETIRE LIKE TWENTY YEARS AGO” DIVISION

DREK’THAR
500 to 1

Chieftain of the Frostwolf clan and friend to Durotan way back in the day.  Lived through the corruption of the orcs, but refused to drink the blood of Mannoroth – granted it was largely because Durotan ordered the Frostwolves not to, but it still shows a certain level of principle AND loyalty to his clan all at the same time.  Greatmother speaks about him just fondly enough to make me feel uncomfortable.  The main down side, other than being blind and spending most of his time getting rolled around in a wheelchair by Captain Galvanger these days, is that since the Cataclysm…well…not to be mean, but let’s face it.  Dude has just gone batshit senile.  And that’s not even getting into the whole thing with him shitting himself.  I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again.  Old age is not kind.

 

EITRIGG
200 to 1

He’s been around for ages, advised both me and Thrall, has watched over Orgrimmar while I’ve been down here in Pandaria, and has always been staunchly devoted to the well-being of the Horde.  If we had some kind of lifetime achievement award to dole out, I would sign him up for it tomorrow, even if he DID get a little grumbly with me over the Theramore thing.  Who didn’t, right?  Shows what those fuckers know.  Anyway.  The point is, though, as much as I like Eitrigg, he’s pretty much one of those guys who’s basically a permanent lieutenant.  You know the ones.  Year after year, they’re always second in command to one general after another, and somewhere along the line, after like the fourth guy gets promoted over them to take command, you realize there’s a reason for it.  Perfectly good at his job, but he’s just never going to be suited for the big chair.

Also, if he were in charge, can you IMAGINE how much time freaking Tirion would probably be spending in Orgrimmar?  Do you really want to subject people to THAT?

 

VAROK SAURFANG
100 to 1

Veteran of two wars.  Served as Thrall’s right hand and as my executive officer in Northrend.  He even served as acting Warchief for a little while, that time when I was off the grid.  At the age of nine zillion, he’s still one of the biggest badasses around.  He doesn’t sleep – he waits.  Death once had a near-Saurfang experience.  Mannoroth became more powerful by drinking HIS blood.  There was going to be a street named after him in Orgrimmar, but the plan was canceled for safety reasons because nobody crosses Saurfang and lives.  When warlocks make someone run away in fear, they pay a royalty to him.  He’s considered an honorary shaman because he commands the element of surprise.  I’m at least 50% sure some of these facts are made up.  But you get the point.

So what’s the case against?  You mean, other than at least two or three occasions that he’s threatened to kill me?  You mean OTHER THAN THAT?  Frankly, he’s a holdover from a Horde that’s a thing of the past – too old, too sentimental, too backward-thinking when we’re trying to move our people forward.  Too willing to extend an olive branch to the Alliance when we need to be smashing them over the head with the whole fucking tree.

Mostly the threatening-to-kill-me thing, though.  I don’t want to tempt fate.  (Along similar lines, by the way, fate doesn’t want to tempt Saurfang.)

 

THE “I MIGHT ACTUALLY CONSIDER PICKING ONE OF YOU PEOPLE” DIVISION 

WARLORD CROMUSH
50 to 1

This one is a dark horse candidate, no question.  But the dude did yeoman’s work in Gilneas when he had the thankless job of keeping Sylvanas marginally under control, he’s run a tight ship in Hillsbrad at a time when the Horde finally secured a firm hold on the region, and he’s been our primary command officer in the Eastern Kingdoms going on a couple years now.  The fact that he’s been able to work with the Forsaken with some measure of success is a major plus – yeah, they’re creepy and sketchy and just plain ol’ EEEESH, but they’re handy to have around.  He probably needs some more grooming for higher things, but he’s worked his way into the conversation for future high-profile assignments.

 

MALKOROK
25 to 1

You know, Malkorok really has most of the bases covered: he’s smart, uncompromising, and relentlessly devoted to the Horde, with a sharp tactical mind and an indisputable ability to get shit done.  He’s reshaped the Kor’kron, tightened up security, and demonstrated he’s one of the people you want fighting beside you on the battlefield.  Down side?  Well, let me put it this way.

About a year ago, some goblins tried to start up a business making wyvern food.  They did all kinds of tests to find a good formula for it as far as ingredients, they did focus groups to give it the most appealing packaging, they launched a huge advertising campaign for it and made sure it was easy to find at all the vendors…and absolutely nobody bought it.  How come?  Because for all the things they had going for them and all the effort they put into packaging it just right…wyverns just didn’t like it.

Draw your own conclusions.

 

GENERAL NAZGRIM
10 to 1

You all know this guy, and have probably worked with him on at least an occasion or two.  And really, if being Warchief was purely a military matter, this would probably be the guy.  He’s an excellent strategist and tactician, he adapts well on the fly, and since he came up through the ranks the old-fashioned way (I remember him serving under me in Northrend as a piddly-ass sergeant…and to put that in perspective, remember, freaking DONTRAG made sergeant), he appreciates what it’s like to be one of the grunts in the trenches and isn’t afraid to get in there and get his hands dirty by their side.  Okay, there was that whole disaster where he shit the bed on security and let Anduin get away, but maybe he can delegate.  But here’s the thing: being Warchief isn’t solely a military job.  It’s also the political head of the Horde, which means that as Warchief, Nazgrim would essentially be steering the ship of state.  And, well…we all know what happens when that guy gets near a ship.

 

WARLORD ZAELA
5 to 1

Leader of the Dragonmaw and a no-kidding-around badass warrior.  She took command of the Dragonmaw clan after helping to overthrow the nutjob “Warchief” Mor’ghor – gotta admire someone who has the stones to take down a corrupted leader for the good of the clan.  She was new to leadership at the time, and I’ll admit I was probably a little tough on her in my assessments early on, but she’s really grown into the role, and she’s been stepping up to work on some more projects for me the last few months.  I’ll also admit I might be swayed by seeing how she went about her business in that other world.  Still a little green, though…I mean, green in the “inexperienced” sense.  Not green in the fel-magic-drinky-drinky-demon-blood-grr-rarr-proud-ancient-culture-down-the-drain-oops sense.  Was that insensitive?  Anyway, she could probably stand to have a few more years working closely under the Warchief before she’s in line for the job herself.  But she’s definitely on the rise.

 

WARLORD BLOODHILT
2 to 1

Bet you didn’t see this one coming, did you?  Just goes to show what an outside-the-box thinker your Warchief is.  Hell, sometimes I’m so far outside the box that I don’t even know where the fuck the box is.  What box, anyway?  Fucking metaphors.

Anyhow, some of you might remember Bloodhilt from the southern Barrens, where he assumed command of our operations after former Warlord (and current zombie sous chef) Gar’dul managed to make a giant mess of things down there.  Bloodhilt cleaned up Gar’dul’s fuck-ups, secured our position in the area, and made it possible for us to make our move on Theramore.  Since then he’s made the trip with us to Pandaria, where he’s been commanding officer at Domination Point.  Just a solid, stand-up officer who’s done nothing but impress from day one.  Any way you cut it, you can get used to seeing his name cropping up, because he’s not going anywhere.

 

So, there’s your breakdown.  On that note, I’m going to call it a day as far as answering the mail goes, but keep those letters coming and I’ll try to answer more of your questions as time allows.  Since Spazzle’s form doohickey worked pretty well for this batch of e-mails, here it is again:

Mutiny!

Posted in Transcripts with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 1, 2013 by Garrosh Hellscream

earthonline9

Since we finished with Shan Kien a few days ago, I’ve been back at Domination Point, partly checking in on things there with Warlord Bloodhilt and General Nazgrim, and partly giving myself a break from Baine and Lor’themotherfucker.  Maybe if I leave them alone with each other, they’ll have no option but to bitch and moan at each other until one of them reaches bitch-and-moan critical mass and spontaneously combusts.  Not likely, I know, but it’s a little dream I have.

As part of my much-needed recuperation time, I finally managed to get Earth Online set up on my computer here.  The internet here at the base is still kind of spotty – I’ve been having to pick my spots as far as when I can blog for the entire time I’ve been here – but Grizzle Gearslip tells me the connection should be stable enough now that I shouldn’t have any trouble getting some gaming in.

 

You have logged on.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  what about blurry vision?  slurred speech?

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  oh hey

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Well well, look who we have here!

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  no

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  it’s probably not one of ours, then.

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  I hope you feel better, ji

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Hey people

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  You sense of humor is, as always, most amusing, Doctor.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  anyway, does anyone have a level 30 something they’d like to team up with?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  But you should be wary of making such jokes, as they may only encourage some to believe we’re actually pursuing such untoward efforts as the creation of plague.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  actually never mind, i should probably get going

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  see you later, ji

[EdwardBear | Ji] has logged off.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  yeah, i can’t imagine where anyone would get that idea about us.

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  has garona gotten there yet?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Huh this is weird…

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  What is, Warchief?

You have been disconnected.

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You have logged on.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  do you think he got mad and logged?

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  oh hey, Garrosh

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  welcome back.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Well, I suppose we’ll see presently, won’t we.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Ugh

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Thanks, Doc

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  did you see my tell?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Is everything all right, Garrosh?

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  Yeah

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  I just didn’t get a chance to answer

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I think so

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  what happened?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I’m not sure, my connection just went out on me

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Well, hopefully it was an isolated hiccup and won’t continue causing you problems.

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  But no, she didn’t get here yet

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  ah ok

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, hopefully

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  Why?

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  just curious

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So anyway, as I was saying

You have been disconnected.

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You have logged on.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  thanks baddie

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  You two are well, I hope.

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  PRETTY GOOD THANKS

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  re-wb

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  And back again.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  hi pwn

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  same problem, boss?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  havent seen u in a while

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Pretty much

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Just getting knocked offline randomly

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Quite frustrating, I’m sure.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, I’ve been traveling for work, so I haven’t been able to log on until now

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  what kind of internet connection do you have there?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  yea i know how that goes

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  i’ve been having to travel around some for work too

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  If you’re looking for something more specific than “apparently a bad one,” you’re talking to the wrong guy

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  hmm

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So anyway

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  How interesting, Leslie.  Anything specific you’re working on these days?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Did they change something in the guild management panel?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I’m sure the details would be fascinating.

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  at the bottom of your UI, mouse over the icon that looks like a little planet

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  that will show your network info

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Not that I’m aware of.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Why do you ask?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  lol your always so interested in my work

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  oh boy…

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  Okay, I’ve got it

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I’m just curious about people’s professional experiences.  ^_^

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I’m showing a lot fewer guild management options than I used to

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So I’m wondering if they changed something

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  ok, at the very bottom of that info box there should be a string of numbers and letters

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  lol well theres alot going on here but alot of it i cant really talk about

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  copy that to me

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Well, no.  Perhaps you should peruse the guild roster a moment.

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  Hmm, okay…give me a minute…

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  here we go…

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh but those are the most interesting ones to chat about under the anonymity afforded by the internet.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  well, you’ve established you work in Dalaran.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  well yes

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Hang on, I’m juggling a couple things

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  if it involves magic research i could probably save you some time finding the tomes you need.

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  HOW DO YOU FIGURE

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  THX1138-NCC1701-PU36

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  oh man

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  well, based on our conversation the other day, I probably know your libraries a bit better than you.

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  who set up your connection down there?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  your serious

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  my serious what?

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  Grizzle Gearslip

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  Why?  How bad is it?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  no, ‘your serious’ is a question

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Okay, guild roster

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  no, “you’re serious?” is a question.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  “your serious” is an incomplete noun phrase.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Um.

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  ugh… he’s good with mining and construction

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  …

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Just exactly

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  WHAT

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  THE FUCK

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  IS THIS?

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  but for networking he might as well be trying to put something together with one of those electronics kits from the wonderworks

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  if you don’t want my help, you can just say no.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  What is what, pray tell?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  YOU KNOW PERFECTLY WELL WHAT

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  HOW exactly is it showing SYLVANAS as guild leader???

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  hoo boy…

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Well, there *are* in-game mechanisms for such things.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  When the current leader is offline for a prolonged period.  ^_^

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  You fucking OVERTHREW me?!?!

You have been disconnected.

.

.

.

.

.

You have logged on.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  I don’t think he would jsut rage quit

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Ah, here he is.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  wb pwn

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  looks like you’re having connection trouble

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Okay so AS I WAS SAYING

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  You OVERTHREW me??!

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  can’t say I’m surprised you’re having trouble staying on

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  You could say that, yeah

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  ^_^

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  So…it’s bad.

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  let me put it this way

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  And hey, hold on, she couldn’t even have DONE this without another officer, so that means either you or Mokvar, Spazzle

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  congratulations, the base hasn’t burned down yet

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  um, well…

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  What’s going on with Mokvar now, anyway?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  It’s funny you should ask, Warchief.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  so yeah staying on topic

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  I was the one who signed off on the dethrone

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I…see

You whispered to [ProfHubert | Faranell]:  Fucking hell is THIS what you were talking about???

[ProfHubert | Faranell] whispered:  um, what?

You whispered to [ProfHubert | Faranell]:  With the “they’re going to turn against you” cryptic bullshit

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  well to be fair, boss, you’d been away for a while and there was no telling when you’d be able to get on again

[ProfHubert | Faranell] whispered:  you realize that was another version of me whose memories i don’t share, right?

You whispered to [ProfHubert | Faranell]:  UGH FUCKING TIME TRAVEL

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  and your connection right now isn’t exactly helping

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah yeah whatever

[ProfHubert | Faranell] whispered:  fucking time travel indeed.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  You people have had your fun, now reinstall me before I get on a boat headed north

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh, very well, Warchief.  If you insist.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I seriously don’t know what the fuck is wrong with people, I look away for a minute and everything turns into a fucking cartoon

[Lorthemar] has logged on.

[Lorthemar] has been promoted to Guild Leader.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  …

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oops.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  YOU’RE FUCKING RIGHT OOPS

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  grats lorthemar!

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  oh this should be good.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  That honestly was a legitimate mistake.  Albeit a funny one.

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Oh…wow…really?

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  CONGRATS ON THE PROMOTION LOR

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I was about to click on you to promote you when Lor’themar logged on.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  i will bet you any amount of money you’re not the only person saying “wow, really?” right now.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  And, well, his character name is right ahead of yours alphabetically.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  So…he bumped you down one spot on the guild list, and…

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Well…thank you, guildmates!

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  are you seeing this, lor?

[Guild][Lorthemar]  This is truly an unexpected honor

[Guild][Lorthemar]  But one for which I shall endeavor to prove my worthiness!

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  yay lor!

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I really don’t know what else to say!

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  i know you’ll make a good guild leader =)

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Thank you!

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  guess not

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  He probably doesn’t realize he has to turn on officer chat.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Okay so seriously

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Oh, hello, Omgipwnedurface.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  yeah probably

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, hello

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So before you get speechifying again, Livindead just made a mistake handing you the reins

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So before you get too excited

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  oh yikes

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Hand them back over

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Oh.

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Well, I suppose LivinDeadGrl DOES have more experience as an officer.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  NOT TO HER YOU FUCKING WASTE OF SPACE

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  PROMOTE -ME-

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Fine, fine, let me find where the command is…

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  does anyone know if there’s a popcorn vendor anywhere in game?

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Well FIND IT FAST LORI

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  WHILE YOU STILL HAVE ONE EYE TO LOOK WITH

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I’m working on it, calm down…

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  what are u looking for sweetie?

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Oh fuck you, Hair-Care

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Huh.

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  WHAT? I’M NOT LOOKING FOR ANYTHING

[Guild][Lorthemar]  You know what?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  oops sorry, that was pwn

[Guild][Lorthemar]  No.

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Fuck YOU.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  i thought it was u typing there

You have been kicked out of the guild.

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  jkhfgkjshgfkjysdgkfiuhsdfjkghskgf

You whispered to [Lorthemar]:  ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  I know, I know

[LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] whispered:  My apologies, Warchief.

[LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] whispered:  I’m trying to calm Lor’themar down now.

[Lorthemar] whispered:  Fuck you, Garrosh

[Proudleslie | Jaina] whispered:  omg what happened?

You whispered to [Lorthemar]:  Oh you REALLY want to die, don’t you

[Lorthemar] is ignoring you.

You whispered to [LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]:  Well now he’s ignoring me

You whispered to [LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]:  So you can tell him to stop being such a tempermental baby while you’re at it

You whispered to [Proudleslie | Jaina]:  Don’t even get me started

[LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] whispered:  Of course, sir.

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  yeah, he’s pretty upset

[MrBadcrumble | Spazzle] whispered:  I don’t know what we’re going to do about GL, but I can invite you back to the guild at least

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  Oh gee thanks

You whispered to [MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]:  I don’t fucking believe this shit

You have been invited to join the guild <Warchief>.

You have joined the guild <Warchief>.

You have been promoted to the rank Recruit.

You have been promoted to the rank Member.

You have been promoted to the rank Officer.

You have been disconnected.

.

.

.

.

.

You have logged on.

[Officer][Lorthemar]  Well that’s just too bad, now isn’t it?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Lor’themar, I understand, but please try to be prudent at least.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  FUCKING HELL

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  wow this is a really bad day for pwn

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  welcome back, boss

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  UGH this is infuriating

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Actually, while we’re inviting, let me bring a friend in as well, if nobody minds.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  sure

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Between the disconnections and Ponytail here all I need is a pickle for the crap sandwich that is my day

[Bob] has joined the guild.

[Bob] has been promoted to the rank Recruit.

[Bob] has been promoted to the rank Member.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  hi bob!

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  WELCOME

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Greetings, Bob!  As Guild Leader, let me welcome you to the guild!

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I’m sure you’ll feel right at home with the <Warchief> tag below your name.

[Guild][Bob]  Tanks, mon!  It’s good ta be here!

[Guild][Bob]  I be lookin’ forward to goin’ on epic missions with lots a ya!

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  This guy seems familiar

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  OH SHIT

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  ^_^

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So…you play EO too, huh?

[Guild][Bob]  Hey, mon!  Do I know ya?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  sigh

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I’ll get you all for this

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  No

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  um

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Nice to meet you

[Guild][Bob]  Good ta meet ya too, OmgipwneduMon!

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  But for now… I’m going to log off before this vein in my forehead bursts

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  quick recommendation, boss?

You whispered to [LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]:  You GET his ass in line, you understand me?

[LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] whispered:  Of course, dear Warchief.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  next time you log on, if you think you smell burning hair, turn off your computer

[Guild][Bob]  So I got a question if anybody knows.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Fine

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  For the duration, Lor’themar, you might want to change the GL title from what I’d set it as.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Taking off now

[Guild][Bob]  If da Lich King’s horse be Invincible, how come I could see it?

[Officer][Lorthemar]  What’s the title now?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  “Queen.”

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  no no, thats invisible

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  oh man, good thing Garrosh is leaving

You have logged off.

Spazzle Speaks: Tell Hell

Posted in Spazzle Speaks, Transcripts with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 18, 2013 by Garrosh Hellscream

earthonline8

You have logged on.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  i’m pretty sure ur wrong

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  hi mrbad

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] I’LL GO GET MY COPY SO WE CAN CHECK

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  i’m quite sure i’m not.

[Guild][Lor’themar]  Greetings, MrBadcrumble!

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  hey ji – you feeling ok?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  no sweetie u dont have to

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  hi MBC

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Ah, Spazzle, I’m glad to see you on.  I’d like to discuss something with you when you have a free moment.

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  yes, i think i’ll be ok

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  hey everyone

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  have you heard anything about mokvar?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  ugh well now hes flown off

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  not a thing

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  just a little sore.

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  why?  is there news?

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  sure

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  oh hi baddie i didnt see u come on

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  do we have more IPs to trace or something?

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  well that’s good

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  No no, nothing quite so technical.

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  not that I know of

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  how’s it going, leslie?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  not bad

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  huh, really?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  same ol same ol really

You whispered to [EdwardBear | Ji]:  well if you need anything let me know

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  You sound surprised.

[LamontCranston] whispered:  Hi there.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  well, after a while you kind of get used to it when people only want to talk to you because they can’t get their printer to work

You whispered to [LamontCranston]  hi

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  OK HERE WE GO

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  SHERMAN’S CODEX RIGHT?

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  at this point I don’t think anything would surprise me, though

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  True… I suppose it comes with being one of the few tech literates in the cohort.

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  I know, right?

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  what are you guys doing?

[LamontCranston] whispered:  Are you busy?

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  volume 2, yes.

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  honestly I don’t understand what Mokvar could be thinking

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  THERES A VOLUME 2?

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  you get used it mostly

You whispered to [LamontCranston]:  a little

You whispered to [LamontCranston]:  were you interested in the guild?

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  that’s the thing, though

[EdwardBear | Ji] whispered:  thanks, i will

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  sorry if I’m slow

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  prof here is trying to tell me there’s teleportation magic that would let someone blink all the way to other worlds

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  trying to juggle a bunch of tells

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh I can sympathize.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  not that there ARE such spells, just that there’s a theoretical basis for them being possible, based on the distorted curvature of space surrounding high velocity blinking.

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  what is?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  and now we’re going to look it up and prove him wrong

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I’m fielding quite a few myself.  Mostly from Lor’themar…I could swear, no sooner do I click back over to officer chat than his whisper tab lights up again.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  what’s going on?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  once we get volume 2…

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  it should be on the shelf below where you got that one.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Something or other with Garrosh and his demands.  I’m not sure exactly.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  faded, dark red cover.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  fourth book from the left.

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  OK ON IT BRB

[LamontCranston] whispered:  No, Spaz, it’s me.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  how do u know that?

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  don’t let me interrupt if you’re talking to him

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  i have a very good memory.

[LamontCranston] whispered:  Mokvar.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  wait, how are you not sure if he’s going on and on about it?

You whispered to [LamontCranston]:  dksjghksdyhgd

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  for him to do all these things he’s been doing… killing the dwarf in ironforge, the deal with magatha, everything…

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  KNOWING I was watching him .. and I know he knew…

[EdwardBear | Ji] has logged off.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  No, it’s fine.  I’m really just tabbing over every few lines and giving him a “right” or an “I can see how that would be frustrating” or an “I don’t blame you at all for being upset.”

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  he would have to be an idiot

[LamontCranston] whispered:  Now before you go tabbing over to do an IP trace, I’m routing through a proxy server to log on.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  huh

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  isn’t that kind of risky?

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  and if there’s one thing we both know about mokvar, its that he’s not an idiot

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  OK NOW WE’RE IN BUSINESS

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  yeah

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  no kidding

You whispered to [Nightengayle | Garona]:  1 sec

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  you have volume 2?

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  kk

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  yea

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  I mean, how do you know what he just said was about being upset and frustrated?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I’ve known Lor’themar a long time.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  now i just have to find the part about long-distance blinking

You whispered to [LamontCranston]:  hang on, since when do YOU know how to mask IPs??

You whispered to [LamontCranston]:  and are you crazy?  what the hell are you doing??

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  page 273.

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  WOW REALLY?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  ok looking, hang on

[LamontCranston] whispered:  Deliana called in a couple favors to set it up.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  right-hand column.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  under the diagram.

[LamontCranston] whispered:  I just needed to get on for a minute to talk to you.

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  HOW DO YOU REMEMBER THAT?

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  like i said, i have a good memory.

You whispered to [LamontCranston]:  mokvar, you have to be careful – garona’s on and she was JUST asking about you

[LamontCranston] whispered:  I saw her on.  I whispered her with a dollar-spam ad and got her auto-ignore.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  sorry i’m going all quiet – trying to fix a bunch of things here

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  ok here we go, see it says it wouldn’t work

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  “blinking beyond azerothian gravitational bounds would prove impractical due to drag produced by the blinking subject’s carried mass.”

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  blinking beyond azerothian gravity would be impractical

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  hey spazzle, I know you’re probably still busy there

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Quite all right.  As it happens, Lor’themar is growing needy even by Lor’themarian standards.  I’m finding myself having to pay attention to some of his prattling.

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  I need to get going

You whispered to [LamontCranston]:  what are you even doing on here?

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  I’m leaving for pandaria in the morning and I need to finish packing

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  right.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  is he still upset?

[Nightengayle | Garona] whispered:  I’ll talk to you later

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  keep reading.

[LamontCranston] whispered:  Like I said, I wanted to talk to you.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Insofar as he hasn’t spontaneously ceased to be Lor’themar, yes.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  oh

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  OH

[LamontCranston] whispered:  I only have a minute, though.

[Nightengayle | Garona] has logged off.

You whispered to [LamontCranston]:  ok…

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  “this obstacle could in theory be overcome by a dispersion of the grounding mass along the blinking vector via a highly concentrated arcane field”

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  oh…wow

[LamontCranston] whispered:  You’re on the short list of people I feel like I can trust, and like I said, I need to talk to you.

[LamontCranston] whispered:  But not here.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  which yes, we don’t know how to do yet.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  but we’re talking theory here.

[LamontCranston] whispered:  Meet me in Everlook in two days.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  that’s really impressive you knew that

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  i read a lot.

User is not logged on.

User is not logged on.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  yea but sherman’s codex volume 2?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  that would be so far down on my reading list i would probably never get to it

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  actually, I need to get off of here for a little while

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  heh, kids.  ;o)

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  I know you wanted to talk to me about something – can we catch up later?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  That’s fine.

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  HEY I’M THOUSANDS OF YEARS OLD

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  If it’s easier, I can e-mail you about it as well.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  ok, sounds good

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  yes, and?

You have logged off.

Spazzle Speaks: Guild Chat Edition

Posted in Spazzle Speaks, Transcripts with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 28, 2012 by Garrosh Hellscream

earthonline3

Hi, everyone.  Spazzle here.  Since Mokvar and I will be sharing blogging duties with Garrosh on his way to Pandaria, I’m taking my turn today updating everyone on what’s going on in Orgrimmar.

And/or Earth:

 

You have logged on.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Are you sure you’re not Utvoch, Dontrag?

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  no i’m dontrag

[Guild][SteveKravitz | Utvoch]  i could swear we’ve talked about this before

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Because I feel fairly sure that you’re Dontrag, Utvoch.

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Hey, Spaz.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  again?

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  really?

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  hey

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I know, I know, but honestly, it just never gets old!  ^_^

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  i really dont think so

[Guild][SteveKravitz | Utvoch]  i’m utvoch, he’s dontrag

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Perhaps we should refer to a third party to resolve the disagreement?  Who is your commanding officer over in Kalimdor?

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  cliffwalker

[Guild][SteveKravitz | Utvoch]  overlord cliffwalker

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Perhaps you should speak to him and ask him to confirm which of you is which.

[EdwardBear | Ji] has logged on.

[Guild][SteveKravitz | Utvoch]  huh maybe

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  we dont need to do that, he’s jsut going to say what we’re telling you now

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  no not maybe ut UGH

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Hey Ji

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Well you won’t know until you ask him, now will you?

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  hi mokvar

[Guild][SteveKravitz | Utvoch]  you know maybe she has a point

[Guild][SteveKravitz | Utvoch]  i’ll go find him

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  no ut u idiot dont listen to her

[SteveKravitz | Utvoch] has logged off.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  oh dammit

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  feeling ok?

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Yeah, I’m fine.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Personally, that only supports my original point.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  what does

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  You are having entirely too much fun with this.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  That he left to find Overlord Cliffwalker just now.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  y

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I really am.  ^_^

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh, watch this.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  b

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  what does b mean

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I believe B is the second letter of the alphabet.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  by the way, has garona been on lately?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Although, since Mokvar is the scribe here, perhaps you should confirm with him.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  i got one of those rooster pets she was trying to farm

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  no i know its a letter

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Huzzah, the spirit of literacy liveth!

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  what spirit

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  like a ghost or something

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  she IS the banshee queen

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  maybe it’s someone over in the undercity

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Well well look at our quiet little webmaster coming out of his shell!  ^_^

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle;)

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Well I’ll see you and raise you…

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Edward, I don’t remember seeing Garona on for a couple days

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  It’s actually the nickname of the phantasm who’s our assistant inscription trainer here.

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  She might just be logging on at odd hours.

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  maybe garrosh should have had them come audition for the temp scribe job

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oooh, trumped by the goblin!

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  i’m confused

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  And all is right with the world.

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  I’m showing nightengayle’s last login four days ago

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  um ok

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  no but like

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  ya i know b is a letter

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  but what did u say it for?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Well, you said “y”.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  um ok

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  You did.  You can scroll up and check if you don’t believe me.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  oh ok … well hopefully i’ll catch her on soon to give it to her

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  I will bet you 1000 gold he’s scrolling up right now.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I said it supported my point that Dontrag left to go talk to Overlord Cliffwalker, and you said “y”.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  ya ok i see that

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  And so I said “b”.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  ya but how come?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Well, I just assumed we were typing random letters.  Is that not how this works?

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  oh

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  no that was y like in why

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh.  Are your “w” and “h” keys not working?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Maybe Spazzle could have a look at them for you.

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Ed, you could always just mail it to her for whenever she logs on, that was you don’t have to be watching for her.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  no my keyboard is ok

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  it saves time

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh, were you in a hurry?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Are you going somewhere?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  To go find Overlord Cliffwalker, perhaps?

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  oh wow really?

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  there’s mail?

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Do you craft this stuff beforehand or are you just making it up on the fly?

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Because honestly, I’m not sure which one would make you more of a genius.

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Um

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  yeah ed – you never noticed the post offices in each city?

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Yeah there is.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  What’s sad is that there’s actually a whole extra layer to this that he’s never going to get to on his own.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh… oh wow.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  no its just faster

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  haha yea

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  I mean, granted he’s very new to the game.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  That poor, poor, adorably clueless little bear…

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  i guess i never looked inside those to see what they were for

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Ah, I see.  Hurry up and wait.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  wait for what?

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  yea but he’s level 27

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Yeah, Ed, if you go in there you can send things to other people in-game.

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Just like in real life, only it takes a couple days rather than an hour to deliver, for some reason.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Perhaps for Dontrag to return and confirm that it is in fact you who is Utvoch.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  i’m not utvoch

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  So you say.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  ya so i say cuz i am

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  i mean i’m not

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  not utvoch

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I’ll go ahead and nudge him through; I don’t want to leave this other part on the shelf, and he’s never going to get to it by himself.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  But as I was saying, the fact that Dontrag went to talk to Overlord Cliffwalker just confirms that I’m right.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  y

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  q

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  g

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  w

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  i mean why

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag] hey are u guys messing with me now

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  y would you think that?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Because, between Dontrag and Utvoch, Dontrag has always been the more circumspect, so if one of you were going to make the effort to seek confirmation on this question, it would be Dontrag.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  but i’m dontrag

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Then why aren’t you checking on this with Overlord Cliffwalker?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  If you -are- Dontrag, let me say in no uncertain terms, you’re being out-Dontragged.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  ok fine then

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  i’ll go ask him

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  and watch what he says

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  by the way, mokvar, did you still want to leave this afternoon

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I only wish I could be there with you when you ask him.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  ya me too

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  anyway whatever

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  If that works for you, Ed, sure.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  be back later

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  where are you guys going?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Goodbye, Utvoch.

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  later ut

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  no

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  See you later, Utvoch.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  ugh

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  fuck it

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  we’re going to take a trip to winterspring, spazzle

[GilbertRose | Dontrag] has logged off.

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  what are you going to be doing up there?

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Not for anything, but we probably want to be more careful about using real names in guild chat anyway.

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  You know, in case you-know-whos 1 or 2 come on.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  there’s a place called timbermaw hold

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  mokvar says there’s a race there that seems similar to the pandaren

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  I don’t know if it’s a case of “or”

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  I don’t think I’ve ever seen just one of them on

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  so he’s taking me to visit so i can see if we might have some common ancestry

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  oh yeah, the furbolg

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  True, Mokvar, although everyone seems to be fairly aware of it when Jaina and Kalecgos are around.

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Oh, so they’re one of THOSE couples…

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  come to think of it

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  would you like to come?

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  i think we’re stopping at a goblin town on the way, aren’t we, mokvar?

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Everlook, yeah.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  so you know them up there, spazzle?

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  oh so all us goblins must know each other huh?

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  kinda racist

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  um

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  i mean

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  kidding

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  oh

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  whew

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Someone’s feeling lively today.

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  I’m sure Spazzle’s got his own stuff to do anyway, Ed.

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  kind of a shame garrosh is missing out on the trip to timbermaw hold, though

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  because of the archbishop thing

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Oh yeah, that’s right.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Pardon?

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  There’s some little-known technicality with the Timbermaw furbolgs.

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  whoever’s warchief, they consider an archbishop

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I’m…fairly sure I’m better off not knowing how that happened.

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  so yeah, he probably would have wanted to go

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Still, just as well I suppose.

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Although it IS kind of a shame we have to miss seeing him in the funny hat.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  speaking of which, has anyone heard anything from garrosh yet?

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Not me.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Nor I.  I would imagine he’s still in transit.

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  They were saying a couple days’ trip, but I got the sense they were being optimistic about the weather.

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  ah ok

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Let me check something, actually.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I will say, it’s been much quieter in guild chat since he’s been away.

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Ed, when you came up from Pandaria, how long did the flight take?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  With a precipitous decrease in the amount of typing in caps.

[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] has logged on.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  hi puff

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  And as if in response.  Well played, universe.

[Proudleslie | Jaina] has logged on.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  bartleby, it was a little under two days

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  hey honaleepuff

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  hey leslie

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  HELLO EVERYONE

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Ah, okay.  And that was flying.  By sea would be longer, I would figure.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  hi mbc

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Greetings, you two.  Your logins are getting more and more tightly timed.

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  WE HAVE OUR COMPUTERS SET UP IN THE SAME ROOM NOW

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  flying from where?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  How charmingly codependent.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  pandaria

[Guild][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  we were just trying to ballpark how long it takes to get there

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  oh wow small world

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  my friend is on his way there now

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh really, Leslie?  Business or pleasure?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  business mostly lol

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  his son is down there too though so i guess he’s looking forward to meeting up

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  uh oh

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  am i guessing right?

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Yeah.  And…oh no.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  How interesting, Leslie.  What’s his son doing down there, if I might inquire?  And whereabouts, as far as you’re aware?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  i’m not sure really

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  last i heard he was trying to work on his studies with some of the locals

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  How industrious.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  I’m sure there’s much for him to learn there.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  lol if he doesnt get himself in to much trouble

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Oh, what could he do there to get into trouble?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  hehe

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  anyway i get the feeling garrosh is going to want me doing some e-sleuthing when he hears about this

[Officer][MrBadcrumble | Spazzle]  so i should get start working on something i can tell him

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  No, really.  Do you have any thoughts on possible examples?  I’m just curious about such things.

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  See you later, Spaz.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  For my nephew, that is.

You have logged off.

 

Sure, fine, as far as informational blog posts go, this is kind of cheating.  At least I’m not subjecting everyone to bad poetry!

Ragequitters never win

Posted in Transcripts with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 5, 2012 by Garrosh Hellscream

earthonline2

You have logged on.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  well that’s the problem with arcane, though.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  for me anyway.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  how you u mean?

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  hi pwn

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Hey, boss.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Hey everyone

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  well basically it’s just that since the magic isn’t strictly -alive-, it doesn’t read tone very well.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  ?

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  hi pwn

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  so i have to be careful what i say, because the magic tends to take sarcasm literally.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  well i mean, why wouldnt it?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  What did I just walk in on?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Or do I not want to know?

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  This one is pretty harmless.

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Edwin and Jaina are deep into magic shop talk.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Ah

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  how are you doing, pwn?

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  well i tend to rely pretty heavily on sarcasm in my day-to-day communication.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Doing okay, gayle

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  hello omgipwnedurface.

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  yeah, pretty much any time he says something, you want to picture him rolling his eyes

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  good to see you as always.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  see, case in point.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  oh lol

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  well that might be hard since i dont know what u look like

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  probably just as well.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  i haven’t aged well.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  lol its ok i like older guys =)

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  oh i remember that phase

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  HEY NOW

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  NO FLIRTING WITH OTHER MEN!

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  lol dont worry sweetie

[Lorthemar] has logged on.

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  hi lorthemar

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  JUST KIDDING

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  I KNOW YOU’RE NOT LIKE THAT LOL

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Greetings, all.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Wow…you know, part of me wants to make a Jaina joke there

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  but mostly I’m just thinking…that poor dragon

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Hey, Lorthemar.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  hi lor

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  I still say scalies just creep me out.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  are you new in the guild?

[Guild][Lorthemar]  No.

[Guild][Lorthemar]  sigh

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Why does everyone keep asking me that?  I’ve been in the guild for months.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  oh ok

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I don’t understand why people can’t remember who I am.

[LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] has earned the achievement [Q’est-ce Que C’est]

[LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas] has earned the achievement [United Nations]!

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  grats BQ!

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  grats

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Congratulations!

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Thank you, all.  ^_^

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Wait, you got the United Nations achievement?

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  unless the game ui is trying to pull a fast one on you.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Indeed!

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Exalted with EVERY national faction?  HOW?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Admittedly, that last rep grind was particularly onerous.

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Which one?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  France.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Oh geez yeah

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  The French don’t like anybody

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Not so; they’re quite fond of me now.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Oh actually, let me take care of this while I’m thinking of it

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  What’s that?

[EdwardBear | Ji] has joined the guild.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  welcome!

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  welcome ed

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Who’s this now?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Ji Firepaw

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  He overheard me talking about the game with Spazzle a couple days ago and got curious

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Ah…well this should be entertaining.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  How are the new pandaren recruits working out so far, Warchief?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Eh…sort of a mixed bag

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  They mean well, but…I don’t know.  We’ll see

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  brb

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Welcome to the guild!

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  So I’m guessing he’s REALLY newbish.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, he’s going to be pretty green

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Speaking of which

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  he seems quiet.

[GilbertRose | Dontrag] has logged on.

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  hi gil

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Edward, type /g to talk in guild chat

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Hello, Utvoch.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  can you see this?

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  ah there we are

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  no this is dontrag

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Welcome aboard, Ed.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Greetings, Edward.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Is this your first time logging onto Earth Online in general?

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  And, are you sure, Utvoch?  I could swear you were Utvoch, Dontrag.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  no, i logged on for a little while last night

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  it looks fun

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  yes i’m sure

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Oh, so this is your first Earth Online character?

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  we’ve talked about this before

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  yes

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Well if you’re so sure about it, I don’t see why we would have had to discuss it repeatedly.

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  But if you insist, I suppose I’ll take your word on being Dontrag, Utvoch.

[Guild][Lorthemar]  A double welcome to you, then!

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  thank you

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  ok good

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  are you new too?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  You really love messing with him, don’t you?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Why yes.  Yes I do.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Whichever one of them he actually is.

[Guild][Lorthemar]  sigh

[Guild][Lorthemar]  No, I’m not.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Can you blame me, really?

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I’m not new.

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  are you sure your not new lor?

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  i dont think i’ve seen you on before

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Yes I’m sure.

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I’m not new, for the hundredth time.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  well of course you’re not new for the hundredth time.  that wouldn’t be new.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  you can only be new once.

[Guild][Lorthemar]  …

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  what class are you playing ed?

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Just say the word if you need any help with anything, Edward.

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  I know some things can be a little confusing at first.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  a farmer

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Hmm, I’ve never played one of those.

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  they don’t really sound too exciting to play

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Oh hey, I’ve got my Refer-a-Friend pet now

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  What kind?

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  You should have gotten one too, Edward

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  A dog

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  don’t you already have one?

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  how do i get it?

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, but the RAF is a random draw from a bunch of breeds

[Guild][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  There are a lot of different breeds.

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  You already have it, Edward.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So for instance, this one I just got is a cocker spaniel

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  If you go to the bottom of your screen, you can open your pet catalog.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  omg i love the new pet sparring!

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  ok

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  oh there it is

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  what kind did you get?

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  how can i see the details?

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Right click on it.

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  anyway we should get going, we have lunch plans

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  bye leslie

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Eat well!

[Guild][HonaleePuff | Kalecgos]  BYE EVERYONE

[Guild][Proudleslie | Jaina]  byeeeee

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  ok i think i see it now

[Proudleslie | Jaina] has logged off.

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  What’s the verdict?

[HonaleePuff | Kalecgos] has logged off.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  it says it’s called a poodle

[Guild][Lorthemar]  You can name it, too, if you want to.

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Those are those fru-fru looking dogs, right?

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  they’re supposed to be smart

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  how do i do that?

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  you mean they make good spellcasters?  or the coders gave them a slightly less nonsensical AI?

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Right click again, then pick “rename.”

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  ok

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  thank you

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  No problem.

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  By the way, Garrosh, did you ever end up talking to the orphanage about Gurtash?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, I put out a few feelers

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Gurtash is that orphan boy who’s been helping take care of the Warchief’s wyvern?

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Yeah.

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Garrosh was thinking of maybe seeing about adopting him.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  ok done

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  done what?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  That’s…that’s remarkable.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Right now Battlewail has me in a holding pattern.  Something about questions about my temperament

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  i named the pet

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  oh nice

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  A preposterous dispersion against your character, Warchief.

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So there’s some meeting they want me to go to with Social Services later this week

[SteveKravitz | Utvoch] has logged on.

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  hi steve

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  hey

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Hang on…we have a Department of Social Services?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Who knew, right?

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  That -had- to have been a Thrall program.

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Yeah, I mean…where the hell have THEY been?

[Guild][SteveKravitz | Utvoch]  hi guys

[Guild][Lorthemar]  So what did you end up naming the pet, Edward?

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Greetings, Steve!

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  i named her winnie

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, I know

[Guild][GilbertRose | Dontrag]  sup man

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Not sure what the deal is with the meeting, but I guess some of the pandas are involved somehow

[Officer][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Oh?

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  after my aunt, jae win

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  she had similarly poofy hair

[Guild][SteveKravitz | Utvoch]  not too much

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, not too clear about any more than that

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Oh actually

[Guild][Lorthemar]  That works.

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Winnie the poodle has a certain ring to it.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  thanks

[Guild][SteveKravitz | Utvoch]  oh hey who’s the new guy?

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Hey Ji, quick question

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  i just joined the guild today

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  nice to meet you

[Guild][SteveKravitz | Utvoch]  no not you

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  yes warchief?  i mean guildmaster

[Guild][SteveKravitz | Utvoch]  i meant the other new guy

[Guild][SteveKravitz | Utvoch]  lorthemar

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  You might know something about this

[Guild][Lorthemar]  ugh

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Okay, SERIOUSLY

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Enough is enough already.

[Guild][SteveKravitz | Utvoch]  ?

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Oh sure, “?” at me

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Well I’ll see your “?” and raise you a “!!!”

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Because I’m SICK AND TIRED of nobody around here ever knowing WHO THE HELL I AM

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Um, what’s this guy’s damage?

[Guild][Lorthemar]  So I’m going to explain this ONE MORE TIME

[Guild][Lorthemar]  SO GRAB A DAMN CRAYON TO WRITE IT DOWN THIS TIME

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I

[Guild][Lorthemar]  AM NOT

[Guild][Lorthemar]  NEW

[Guild][Lorthemar]  Is that CLEAR enough for you IDIOTS?

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I HAVE BEEN IN THIS GODDAMN GUILD FOR MONTHS

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I CAN REMEMBER BEING ONLINE WHEN HALF YOU OTHER PEOPLE JOINED

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I’M NOT A RECRUIT, I’M NOT SOMEBODY’S COUSIN

[Guild][Lorthemar]  I AM LOR’THEMAR THERON, DAMMIT!

[Guild][Lorthemar]  REGENT LORD OF QUEL’THALAS

[Guild][Lorthemar]  It NOT HARD to remember that part

[Guild][Lorthemar]  LOOK

[Guild][Lorthemar]  <–

[Guild][Lorthemar]  SEE HOW THAT WORKS, YOU MOUTHBREATHING IDIOTS?

[Guild][Lorthemar]  “Lorthemar”…IS LOR’THEMAR

[Guild][Lorthemar]  THAT’S ME

[Guild][Lorthemar]  LOR’THEMAR FUCKING THERON

[Guild][Lorthemar]  RULER OF THE BLOOD ELVES

[Guild][Lorthemar]  ME

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  oh hi, lorthemar.  welcome to the guild.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  did you just join?

[Guild][Lorthemar]  sdfghliuhurtyhweuirthlidrhglsdajghfljksdhg

[Guild][Lorthemar]  THAT DOES IT THE HELL WITH YOU ALL

[Guild][SteveKravitz | Utvoch]  um no prof he just said he’s been in the guild a while

[Lorthemar] has logged off.

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  well what crawled up his ass?

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  He’s a blood elf.  Who knows

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  um

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  people don’t usually get that upset about this game, do they?

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Um, well…

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  your naivete is adorable.

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Quick pointer, Ji…don’t queue for any battlegrounds.

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  or dungeons

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Or pay attention to trade chat when you’re in the major cities.

[Guild][ProfHubert | Faranell]  and while you’re at it you might just want to uninstall the whole game right now and cancel your internet service.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  oh.  um.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  i guess i’ll go back to leveling

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Where in the world are you?

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  orgrimmar

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  No, I mean, where in the game?

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  But like I was starting to say like ten minutes ago

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  i just got sent to a region called siberia

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Do you know anything about these meetings your panda friends are working on for Social Services, Ji?

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  a little bit, yes sir

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  the orphan matron suggested i arrange for some of my people to help

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  since pandaren culture places great value on being centered and grounded emotionally

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Yeah, you guys do seem very even keel

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  we try to be, yes sir

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  so a few of my people are helping hold some sessions on some of our methods and principles

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  particularly for controlling anger

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  …

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  So ANOTHER one basically telling me I have a temper?

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  see i TOLD you you needed to work on not being angry all the time

[Guild][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  YOU stay out of this

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  oh hey

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  well clearly i’m not the only one thinking it!

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  Clearly a sign of their failure to appreciate the pressures and stresses that come with the laudable work you do day in and day out.

[Officer][LivinDeadGrl | Sylvanas]  When you’re not playing video games or blogging.

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  i was going around fighting a few things for xp, when these mobster npcs attacked me and ran off

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  and now i have things missing from my inventory

[Guild][Nightengayle | Garona]  oh those russian mob guys are nasty

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  You said you were in Siberia?

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  Okay, so I think I need to go do some checking on this

[Officer][Omgipwnedurface | Garrosh]  I’ll be back

[Guild][EdwardBear | Ji]  yes

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  Yeah, you have to watch for that.

[Guild][Bartleby | Mokvar]  In Soviet Russia, mobs farm you.

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