Could we have the demons back?

We stopped at Splintertree Post first, but there was no Mortimer there.  I was pretty much guessing as far as where to look for him, since I’d originally found him at Hellscream’s Reach, which, well, doesn’t exist as an outpost in this world.  Our next stop was Silverwind Refuge, and there we finally had some luck.  Good and bad, actually, depending on how you count.

On the good: among the windrider master’s batch of wyverns, I spotted that familiar mane.  I’m not sure if he somehow remembered me from the other timeline, or if there’s just something about me that drew him to me in either world, or if it’s that I knew to call him by name – whatever it was, Mortimer saw me approaching, climbed down from his perch, and came right over.  I notified Wind Tamer Shoshok that one of her wyverns was being requisitioned.

On the mixed-bag-ish: well…

 

DRANOSH:  I know you said you need to go gather some information, but you know we could just give you any number of wyverns.

GARROSH:  You can give Mokvar any number of wyverns.

DRANOSH:  What’s so special about this one?

GARROSH:  <chuckles>  I wouldn’t even know where to start.

While Garrosh and Dranosh talk, there’s a murmuring among the Silverwind troops behind them, followed by the voice of…

UTVOCH:  Warchief!

DRANOSH and GARROSH:  <turning and overlapping>  What?

UTVOCH:  So glad to see you, sir!  You won’t believe what’s been going on lately!

GARROSH:  Um, Utvoch, are you talking to me or the Warchief here?  You seem confused.

MOKVAR:  “Utvoch, you seem confused.”  There’s something you never hear.

DRANOSH:  Uh, Garrosh, do you know this person?

MOKVAR:  Not yet.

GARROSH:  <rubbing forehead>  Yeah, yeah, I do.  Kind of.  Warchief, let me introduce Scout Utvoch.  I’ve had…some dealings with him…in the past.

UTVOCH:  Sir!  A great honor to see you again, sir, a very great inconceivable relief—

GARROSH:  <smacks Utvoch>  That’s not what that word means in any reality.

MOKVAR:  Garrosh, you know, if Utvoch is here, that probably means…

DONTRAG:  <calling from a distance while sprinting over>  Utvoch!  What are you doing?

GARROSH:  <perks an eyebrow at Mokvar>  You just had to jinx us, didn’t you?

Mortimer cringes and edges back from Dontrag and Utvoch.

UTVOCH:  Dontrag!  Look, Garrosh is here, and I’m just telling him and the Warchief—

DONTRAG:  Oh for goodness’ sake, Ut, are you going to start bothering them with that idiocy about you being somewhere else only it’s not somewhere else only there’s nobody there except you other than the people who are there that aren’t here?

GARROSH:  <spins to Mokvar>  See?  SEE?  I told you!

UTVOCH:  I’m telling you it’s true, Dontrag!  I really was seeing it and – <turns back to Garrosh> and – and it wasn’t a dream of a hallucinationatory or anything!

DONTRAG:  Idiot, you were standing right next to me every time you said it happened and I didn’t see a blasted thing.

DRANOSH:  So, okay, who is this one, then?

GARROSH:  This is Sergeant Dontrag, Utvoch’s…well, I’m not going to say “better half”…

MOKVAR:  They kind of come as a set.

GARROSH:  Kind of like peas in an incredibly retarded pod that almost, not quite but almost, makes you hope the demons win.

DRANOSH:  That’s not funny, actually.

DONTRAG:  I… High Overlord… I’m honored that you know me, sir.  A great vast honor to think that my reputation would have reached you all the way in Orgrimmar, sir!

GARROSH:  Wait, what?

MOKVAR:  <aside to Garrosh>  Uh, you never would have met them here.  Utvoch only remembers you because…you know… <does Nozdormu’s “wibbly wobbly, timey whimey” hand motion>

GARROSH:  <aside to Mokvar>  Oh…yeah…right…  <to Dontrag>  Right, well, see, Dontrag, I always make a point of keeping an eye on the, um, performance of all our soldiers.  Just part of my job.

DONTRAG:  Oh, um, really…?

DRANOSH:  It is?

DRO SHADOWFREE:  <chiming in from nearby>  Have you been satisfied with my work as well, Overlord?

GARROSH:  <spitting his words out curtly with a quick, annoyed glance at Dro>  Shut the fuck up, you don’t matter.

DRO SHADOWFREE:  Oh…

DONTRAG:  An honor to meet you as well, Warchief.  Please don’t let my friend here bother you with his idiocy.

UTVOCH:  You’re one to talk about idiocy!

DRANOSH:  So, um, Garrosh, is this one the brains of the operation or something?

MOKVAR:  I think that question might make the universe cry.

GARROSH:  Yeah, uh, not so much.  Think of them more as covering complementary parts of the idiot spectrum.

DONTRAG:  <crestfallen>  I’m…sorry, sir…

DRANOSH:  So why are these two important again?

GARROSH:  They’re not.  They’re really, really not.

MOKVAR:  Garrosh, if I could make a suggestion…we might actually want to bring them with us.

GARROSH:  Dude, we’ve already watched the Burning Legion and Scourge overrun Orgrimmar, have we not suffered enough for one day?

MOKVAR:  Well at least Utvoch.  You know…  <makes the “timey whimey” gesture again>

DONTRAG:  Wait, why is he more important?

UTVOCH:  Hah, suck it, Donty.

MOKVAR:  More importantly, because of…you know who.

GARROSH:  <eyes go wide a moment>  Good point.

DRANOSH:  Does someone want to fill me in?

GARROSH:  Yeah.  Right.  Here’s the thing, Dranosh.  Part of the idea I was talking about before, the way we might be able to undo everything that’s happened – it all depends on a human who was in Orgrimmar.  A mage named Edwin Faranell.  If we’re going to have any chance at all of doing this, we have to find him.

UTVOCH:  Oh, hey, Edwin?  But he’s still human now?  It didn’t wear off or anything?  I just figured he was still that way because of when that naaru soul crystal coldcocked him in the cellar.

DRANOSH:  Okay, I’m going to give you thirty seconds to start making sense before I start taking an axe to you.

MOKVAR:  Might as well save yourself thirty seconds and just kill him now.

GARROSH:  POINT BEING.  Utvoch knows Faranell, so he could be handy for helping look for him.  Maybe.

DRANOSH:  What’s so important about the mage?

GARROSH:  It would take a really long time to explain.  And a lot of it still wouldn’t make a lot of sense.

UTVOCH:  It doesn’t make a lot of sense to me and I was there.

GARROSH:  You just described LIFE for you.

UTVOCH:  Yes, sir.  Sorry, sir.

GARROSH:  What’s important is that if we can’t find him, this whole plan is dead in the water.

MOKVAR:  Last we saw him, he was on his way to the zeppelins with the last of the evacuees.

DRANOSH:  Assuming he made it out, that would put him at either Thunder Bluff or Theramore.

GARROSH:  Okay.  So here’s the plan.  I need some questions answered before we do anything else, and there’s only one place to get the answers.  I’m going to take Mortimer here to Tanaris.  I’ll need Mokvar with me.  In the meantime, Dranosh, you’ve got to find Faranell.

DRANOSH:  <grins half-heartedly>  You’re the boss, Overlord.  I’ll do a search in Theramore first and get our forces organized for a second front against the Legion.  After that, I can head to Thunder Bluff.

GARROSH:  We’ll meet you there after we’re done on our end.

DONTRAG:  A question, Overlord?

GARROSH:  <sighs>  Yes, Dontrag.

DONTRAG:  Who’s this Mortimer person?

 

“Wait, he named his wyvern ‘Mortimer’?”  “I think that was already his name.”  “Who gave it that name?”  “I think they said he just already had it himself.”  “How’s that possible?  The wyvern named itself?”  “I don’t know, why don’t you ask him?”  “I don’t speak wyvern, Ut.”  “You barely speak orcish, Donty.”

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